Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

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Dark/Bad thoughts...

deleted_user
deleted_user
Hello... I've been in and out of the hospital for the past month and a week ago the Dr. started me on Seraquel. I immediatley noticed a differance, my mind slowed down and I was able to indentify my thoughts and better deal with them. It was pretty amazing, but I have not yet been diagnosed with with Bi-polar disorder. All the symptoms seem to fit, which brings me to my question....

What are peoples experience with "Dark" or "Bad" thoughts that I've read are associated with Bi-polar disorder???

My thoughts seem to center around me hurting other people, for example, people who are talking to me nicely, including family members. I'd never hurt anyone, but these intrusive thoughts are very difficult for me. I've experienced thoughts like this all my life, but I've always assumed they were associated with a head injury I had when I had when I was 16.

Anyhow, anybody have any input on this for me??
deleted_user
deleted_user
I feel badly cuz i have hateful thoughts too. Even about people who are being nice to me. I don't get it.

It makes me feel badly that I have the "bad" thoughts about someone who is helping me. I wonder if they are from not being able to express myself, when I was a child, or if they are just real thoughts i have about a person and don't know how to express them to that person; like resentment or anger.

I mean these are bad thoughts about some people who are helping me and being nice to me. It sucks.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I can't say i've ever had feelings of wanting to harm someone close to me or nice to me but i do have angry thoughts. Things from the past mostly if we went thru a hard time. On the other hand i've had dark thoughts about myself and how i would hurt myself or end it all. Its really scary to think of it now but i was serious about it then. I never really had the nerve to actually do anything but cut.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Head injuries can make BP worse but not cause it. I worked w/brain injured adults & many had violent outbursts. I've had 2 bad head injuries but seroquel has helped so much. I used to think of suicide & sometimes wanted to kill people for the stupidest things, like road rage. Get in front of me on the road & I'd go nuts. I don't drive anymore (due to seizures) but those hateful thoughts are calmed down by the seroquel. Everyone, even "normals" have bad thoughts, though! It's crucial to be able to not act on the hateful feelings or ideas. So that's where therapy & meds can help so much. Also, talking with people like on this site. Jason, the fact that you are brave enough to talk about this openly means you are a good person!
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