I have been depressed for several months now and am oh so tired of feeling this way! Recently I have gotten sloppy with my meds (taking Abilify and Lamictal). Once before in the past I skipped meds and became manic (somewhat deliberately). I suppose that is kind of what I'm going for again; although, it's been over a week and no mood change. I know that sounds dumb to do, knowing the erratic behavior that could transpire. But I miss the energy, the creativity, my more outgoing personality, that great high!!! I've found my self like dwelling on becoming manic. I want to be in that Wonderland of Mania! Feel alive again. Does anyone ever kind of crave mania? And could it work that way? Could it be possible to talk yourself into mania? I would be interested to know if anything like this has happened to anyone or if you guys think it to be possible.
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