Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

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COmfort amongst Chaos...

deleted_user
deleted_user
I am wondering if any of you feel like this....

I feel more comfortable in chaos then in calm and clean enviroment. I find that I really like the clean sleek appearance of a house that is clean and clutter free, but that if my house is like that I am extreamly uncomfortable. There is a line between to much mess and just right but I feel more comfortable with some clothes on the floor and a couple soda bottles on the night stand then a clean room. Im not sure why I feel this way. If the room is clean to other people I usually can see all the things wrong with it. I dunno if I like it some what messed up so that I dont see all the flaws in the enviroment or if just having the chaos makes me comfortable... how ever I cant handle people bing in my enviroment with it cluttered and a mess....

Does any one else feel more comfortable in Choas then in Calm and if so is it your home or your work or your car or your relationships? DO you perfer to be in the middle of crisis's all the time wether yours or other peoples???
deleted_user
deleted_user
i dont think i prefer it, i think i just end up there... and the cleaning part,,hmmmm procrastination? and energy.. and the back pain i get after cleaning
OK OK, i'm full of excuses!
deleted_user
deleted_user
I know a lot of times Im just being lazy about cleaning stuff like taking the trash out.. there is no reason I cant do it but I wait and make my hubby do it... same with unloading the dishwasher... but I also find I make clutter just so I feel comfortable after I get done cleaning... drives my hubby insane
deleted_user
deleted_user
It's called the "lived in look" somewhere where you can go plop on the sofa and kick off your shoes. Whenever I see home improvement or home decorating shows I wonder where do they put all of the necessary clutter of everyday living?
deleted_user
deleted_user
My therapist once asked me what I would do if I didn't have chaos in my life. I couldn't answer. I came from a very rough childhood. Chaos was everywhere I went. I was the same way. I didn't know how to handle it when things were calm and quiet. I think it goes hand in hand with abuse and stuff....
deleted_user
deleted_user
I cringe and feel a lot of guilt over the state I let my house get into. It's always a chaotic mess. When I'm feeling good and can get a room clean I feel fantastic. I prefer clean and tidy I just can't get past all the chaos in my head enough to keep up with the cleaning. Which of course adds to the guilt and my shame. I don't invite people to my home and feel even more isolated because of that. Viscious Circle.
deleted_user
deleted_user
My house reflects my mood and my mood reflects my house. Today the house is picked up where company would see it, but a mess behind closed doors. You figure out my mood?? LOL
deleted_user
deleted_user
I was told once that if you grew up with chaos then that's what your are comfortable with so you will continue to bring it into your life.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Until I was about 11 my home was ALWAYS clean and there was little clutter and I had a stable life with my MOM. My dad entered the picture and made havok in my life including abuse and general chaos... my mom held it together but it was always behind the doors... My mom doesnt understand how me and my brothe rcan stand a messy house cause thats not what we were raised in but I think the mess is my mind exploding around me
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