How can I, with a clear conscience, continue to subject others to this self defeating evil from within? Do I exist for the sole purpose of causing dischord? If I were insanely wealthy I coud just hand people money just to keep them from communicating with me. "I cant deal deal with you so heres $100.00...go away." Why is this place so foreign? A crude semblance of something that I once knew as reality. This world is a synthetic reproduction of reality. Everything tastes and smells artificial. A womans touch feels like a cliche. I am dead. A ghost wandering thru this rhealm. I can only experience emotion as I see it on other peoples faces, never really knowing the feeling, just the way it looks.
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
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