I hate gaining weight on this crap. I have lost all friends but 1. I have "the runs" every day. I can't tolerate heat as well as usual. I don't know if I'm up or I'm down and as soon as I discover it, I flip. I can't sleep at all or I sleep too much. Very few understand how I feel. I feel "swept under the rug". Certain sounds bother me greatly. My credit report is shot. I do have a lot of nice things from overspending. The hospital probably knows me by first name. My pdoc is a moron. My old therapist is great and my new therapist is a student. Having a student as a therapist makes me nervous. I know more about bp than my student therapist. My memory sucks. My cognitive skills suck. I worry a lot about the future. I can't find a job. I have been unable to hold down a job for very long. I've been on long term and short term disability and I'm only 32. My medicine cabinet looks like a pharmacy. I've tried so many meds that I can't remember them all. I have not had a romantic relationship for almost 2 years. I have no sex drive. I spend way too much time on the computer. I have traveled to some pretty cool places in the US and overseas. My parents live on a lake and I have a great tan. Why does that matter? I also have OCD but it doesn't bother me anymore. I have 3 relatives with bipolar and 3 relatives with schizophrenia. Many with depression. I often feel sorry for myself and expect others to as well. I think I would rather have a disease that caused physical pain. I don't feel so alone when I read or post here.
Posts You May Be Interested In
Hi all! This is for those of you that have or have had the same neurologist for 4 years or more. I have been with mine now since 2009. He is one of the best movement disorder secialists in the midwest. I know he is extremely busy on the lecture circuit now and in fact not taking new patients there is a huge waiting list for him. BUT.... I feel like my visits are not what they use to be. He...
I gave my 2 week notice last Friday 13th. Now to join you fine people in a life of leisure and nothing else to do but to look out for myself....is it just me or does that sound pretty boring? My goal was to live to retire and I guess having to take early retirement because of health reasons wasn't exactly the way I had planned things. I just can't stay in that building that is reeking mildew...