tonight i had an episode where i was set off and i spiraled so badly that i blacked out and dont remember a certain about of time. what i said, or did. my husband and i had an argument then i was ok i was lauging and fine then i snapped everything went dark. my husband said i stormed out of the house took my keys and i just sat in my car. this scares me so much its like i slipped into a black void and had no control over what i did. he said i threatened to kill myself i sat out in my car for over an hour w/o the heat on. i didnt come out of it till he came outside to get me. ive never been like this before. its like i snapped. im so scared bc what would have happened if my car hadnt been blocked in? where would i have ended up? i was never like this before. im so upset idk what to do or where to turn. i want to stop taking my Geodon. i told my pdoc that i cant sleep and hardly eat im incredibly emotional all he did was double my dose. my mind doesnt stop spinning i hardly eat i cant sleep. i was never like this before. i just want it to stop i want it all to just go away.i just dont know....
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