Looked at your meds and it seems like you are not on an anti depressant? Maybe you need to try one.They help alot with mood elevation and the whole depression thing.Sorry you are feeling so bad.Maybe call the Dr and see what he thinks?

I am so empathizing with you. The blackest place imaginable, I have been there too many times.

Over 20 years I have taken so many antidepressants and none of them worked, until I tried Wellbutrin. It was a miracle for me.

Please see your doc and keep trying.

{{Major Hugs}}

Julie

i agree with what the others said, go see your pdoc and get your meds tweeked, you probably need to see a therapist to vent out your problems and get some stress management! (((hugs))) hang in there, it can only get better!

I went to the therapist yesterday.... and I seem to pull it together when I am there and then lose it later on after I get home. I am going to my Pdoc next Friday and I am sure I can hold out until then... I am tired and sleepy from the Xanax but feel less like flying off a cliff.

My daughter goes to court today for driving without a license... I feel like a schmucky mother...

Do you ever wonder how to make up for the mistakes of your past? Looking back over my life I realize I have done some pretty bad things that at the time I had no idea were wrong. I was undiagnosed for something like 25 years I am betting. I used to medicate myself with alcohol and the bipolar would explain the attempts to jump out windows while drunk... the risky sexual behavior as a teen... the taking of things that weren't mine... I don't want to go backwards and I have a good handle on right and wrong now... but the guilt is killing me... suggestions?

i feel so sorry for you right now.
i've been where you have with the depression. now i would advise go to the doctor and he/she will change ur meds.
to be honest i'm not a good patient. i just took my medication for a couple of weeks and said f this i'm living my life.
From my friends i know i have good morals so there's not much i can do wrong. and morals have to be at the core.
when i was depressed i just stopped intertaining the the notion of jumpin off the cliff. just don't think bad notions its a bit flighty i know but positive vibes work. i know people might think i'm suppressing feelings but was there ever a commandment that said life had to be serious. if you find urself getting into this state distract urself by focusing on exercise crosswords work something talk to someone about random stuff that make you happy. meet people and talk about random everyday things not such morbid things. go out with friends. Constant company for the next while will do u the world of good. but do take ur meds i'm not advicing anybody to do what i've done.after a while you'll see there probably isn't much of a point to life but it can be a whole lot of fun. charity work where you get to interact with people who have totally different issues can be really rewarding and a big eye opener, if you can do this. it would be good.

as for past mistakes honey there's plenty of people who have done worse and they don't have bypolar. whatch if ur sorry for them well and good that's enough you don't have to go around apologising to everyone. ur not in this world to be loved by everyone or to love everyone. and if sopmeone can't see youre no longer irratic, their bad. honey go out and live. just think about what you do and constantly ask is this right or wrong and just do the right thing. i can't emphasise enough that yesterday doesn't matter. as long as you can support a roof over ur head and put bread and butter on the table you'll be grand.

i hope ur not stressed about ur daughter.
trust me alot of good company with people u trust will do you the world of good. do stuff sports will be good. socialise, doll ur self up again. make fun.

i know this is all real cheesey but it can only help and it's worth a try. but as long as ur a nice good and in my books non judgmental ur there, let's face it here for a good time not a long time.

sorry for blabbing on and on.
hope you'll feel better soon.

i know that feeling oh, too well. i am in the process of firing my shrink and obtaining a new one. i think having a good support system, whether it be shrink, famliy, friends, ds, etc.. is a good start.. finding the right med tweak is another... and venting is a bonus #3. im trying to work on all of them.. so far i am at step #1 with firing. hang in there. you're not alone.