I feel really bad writing this but if I dont I feel like something is going to happen. I think I must be really sick or insane or something because I have an addiction to being in hospital. When I first started taking overdoses I genuinely wanted to kill myself, but now I just want to hurt myself and put myself in hospital. It's not for attention, its because I get to be away from everything because I'm so exhausted by fighting this every day. I also feel like I deserve punishment. I have spent all of the last two days planning my next overdose and part of me wants it to kill me but the other part just wants to be away from everything for a few days. I cant explain any better than that. Sorry if everyone thinks I'm weird/bad. I cant tell anyone because if I do they will just think that all I want is attention and they will ignore me. I couldnt stand that. Sorry everyone.
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