I am allowing 5 minutes of self-pity today, as I am just plain sick of it all. BP2 with very minor hypomania and frequent depressions that have been non-existent since March 2008 - Yeah! Taking lithium, lamictal, lexapro and occasional klonopin for anxiety or to help with sleep. I am fortunate to have a great family/husband, but I can see it taking it's toll after many years. He's finally talking to someone about it. I worry that one day he'll have had enough and I'll be left alone, BP2 and undesirable to anyone, without access to life insurance or disability/med insurance. Crazy to worry, no doubt. Worry about my anxious daughter who now has a herniated disc and is limited (only 14) - worried she will get depressed with back issues and may end up bipolar also. Mad about taking meds everynight- just a reminder of how this is a rotten disease. Angry that my hair is like brillopads, I've gained weight, and my memory is shot due to recurrent depression and meds. It's just amazing how massive the impact can be. Just want to be like other adult women who handle life's rollercoaster ride with ease - sometimes feel like shleprock character from Flintstones with that cloud over my head. OK - done venting. Life is actually good, I'm lucky to have a family, home, cute cat, and the ability to make this situation better than it could be. Just want my daughter to be OK.
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