Hey Kaboo! its me again! You should have asked me this question! this one I understand completely. Asking and seeking for help are extremely hard to do..I know. I been there too! But if you don't seek help you will never get any better and in some cases it will just get worse. It's not all that scary. You go to your docotr and tell him whats up. (most doctors never believe you and might try to put u on anti-depressants but this isnt good because anti-depressants usually have the oppisite affect on bipolar disorder) but ask for a referal to see a psychologist or some form of mental health assesser and they can hook you up . You go you talk..they asess..its really not all that bad..then they work on getting you into a program and on meds that are going to work for you. It can actually be very exciting! Its new and things will look up and seem hopeful! If you want help hun, then you'll go. Take care of yourself gurly because you owe it to urself. You are worth something, and my guess is that you're a very bright unique and wonderful, talented person. i know that sometimes its hard to see urself as that but thats another thing that you can get help with. GO! Find a close friend or family memeber and tell them whats up and ask them to be your support. Having support is a great thing. Its hard to do but once you find that one person its wonderful to have when u walk through that door to get the help you need.Everythings gonna be alright chicky.

sometimes bipolar people like me included get mad and don't remmeber much of what happerned when we get mad like when i am manic i get soo mad and do alot of things i wouldn't regularly do if i wasn't manic most of the stuff i do when i am manic i don't remmember it's almost like sometimes it never happened

yeah, you are not bipolar if you dont have manic episodes. Those are different for every individual. Do some research about Mania and if that doesnt sound familiar then you may just be suffereing from some form of depression. I get euphoric mania. I had had agressive/angry manic states a few times. All in all i never remember much about them. Some of those states have lasted a few minutes or hours and somedays they last for a day or 2. I usually remember the just of them. I never remember the order of my actions or thots nor do I remember anything I talk about. I do however remember the ideas that are runnin through my head.