sorry if its a difficult one folks it is for me too dont worry if you cant share yet cos neither can i, hope i havent been insensitive to anyone xx

Claire I have not lost anyone to suicide. However I can say that from my standpoint you certainly have not been too insensitive.

If you need to tell your story and aren't ready to post in public. Feel free to email it too me, I promise to handle it gently.

My boyfriend of 4 yrs took his life on Oct. 6th. Yes, it is something that will stay with you always but through the journey of grief you learn, somehow to go on. It is only by the Grace of God that I was able to get myself out of bed the first two weeks. Trust that you are NEVER alone - God is only a whisper away. It's ok to cry. Personally I keep a journal and write in it daily. It is good to release the emotions and I have found that writing them down has really helped. I pray for peace & comfort in your life today.

Claire - I lost my oldest son to suicide just 2 months, 15 days ago. I lost my second son 15 years ago from an accidental shooting. I had learned to go on living without my second son. My oldest son missed him dearly. It was so devastating for all of us. But this death by suicide is different - it is hard to fathom that my son would rationally take his life, leaving his family, dear wife and two sons. So different than an accident. Right now, I am running on "shock" - I only break down occasionally. I have so many things to do to help my daughter (my son's widow) and my grandchildren, I don't take the time to grieve. I read somewhere that the first year, suicide survivors live with shock and it is the second year, that the real pain begins. Maybe that is why I am able to focus on getting things done...I don't know. But when I do go "there", the grief hits me to my core. I try not to stay "there" long because I'm afraid I won't come back again. I hope this helps you some - I do know it helps talking about the suicide and your feelings. Even if it is to strangers like this website. Someone told me there is a families & friends of suicide group here - I plan on going there soon. If you want to, you can go to the "F" and find them. Take care of yourself. always, Shirley

Well according to the coroner report my father over dose but they cant say if it was intentional or not,It is hard to beleive that he would take his own life.So I choose not to.My dads cousin commited suicide and it has affectd everyone.My uncle Guerro,his daddy cant even drive by certain places in town to this day..But the saddest thing is noone even knew ANYTHING WAS WRONG!! The guilt is the worst..I have tried to kill myself and was almost damn near successful.I am thankful that God placed people in my path to spare me..I dont even want to think about what that wouldve put my family thru..I am so sorry you are going thru this.But not alone..Sorry I didnt get into details as I am sure I would breakdown.But I hope this helps some.

i recently lost my oldest child, she was 16, she hung herself. I feel like my life is over. i miss her so much

when I was 10, my brother killed himself. He's was 16 and his name was Ronny. I really loved him and when he died, I felt I had noone left in the world because my mother was an alcoholic/addict and abusive as well as her boyfriends. I felt left behind, angry at him for leaving me...yea I can't really say that much yet either I guess.

My sister took her life 13 years ago.If you like you can go to my profile and click on families and friends of suicide .Its a wonderful support group. hugs ,maggie

My Mom may have committed suicide... they haven't gotten the toxicology report back yet. But she was a healthy 53, other than having bi-polar. I can only imagine how painful it must be, I'm sorry ~HUGS~

My brother committed suicide when he was 21 (I was 17). His wife and him were having problems and she'd leave him and go back to their home town and he'd come get her and it was a cycle. One night we called and she said she was leaving him and this time for good. She got a ride and packed up the kids and all their stuff and left. He knew it was serious that time. He spent time in the garage. Then he went into their apartment took some sentimental items out and hung himself from a ceiling fan with an electrical cord. The police found him 4 days later. I was the only one not working but rather than drive the 5 hours to see him (and I could have been there before his wife left) I was selfish and wanted to go to a youth group function. It was my last lock-in as a youth. We were headed up to a wedding a few days later and decided we better call the police. I felt so terrible and responsible. I still do. I could have been there and I wasn't. Not to mention I didn't go there and he was dead for 4 days. What kind of sister am I? I loved him and I really miss him and I'd give anything to give him a great big hug.

thankyou all for sharing your stories i know it can be difficult. I am not new to losing someone to suicide it happend 12 years ago, my first love and i had argued, he had upset me so i told him that i wouldnt have him back, despite him begging me, the last thing he said to me on the phone was that i was invited to his funeral, which made me furious at him for such a threat! How guilty do i still feel, because the night after that 2 policemen called to tell me that he was dead, he had hung himself from the loft opening at the top of the stairs where he lived, his dad found him. He'd left a suicide note telling them to let me know, and that he loves me, i was extremely shocked and devastated. It has taken years to grieve and write about this! lots of hugs to you all and im so sorry for your losses x claire x

I don't know that I will ever be able to tell the whole story. I admire you for telling your story so honestly. Guilt is such a powerful thing. Your boyfriend knew and understood that. Mine probably did also - the ultimate form of final control.

My little brother shot him self on November 28th. He didn't leave a note or any real reasons. He was only 14.

my big sister hung herself in june this year whats your story im here if you wanna chat ok hunny take care emmax

ok read it hunny well done for finally talking about it dont blame your selfe he was not well