Am I being selfish when everyone is only asking how my daughter (my son's widow) is doing - but wanting them to ask me, the mother, how I am doing? This is the second son I have lost and it is unbearable if I let myself think about it. My daughter (who I love dearly and have a very close relationship with) only knew my son for 6 years; I knew him for 35 years. I continue to stay strong for her and my two grandsons, but this is not easy. I know I need to go to the cemetary and get grief-relief, but I have no time. Getting their house ready to sell has been taking 5-6 hours a day, so when I get home, I make meals, do laundry, and go to bed. Doesn't anyone realize that though I seem "together", it is only the necessary face I need to have on for them. If I let myself go "there", all I feel is gut-wrenching sadness and disbelief. Sorry, I just needed to get this off my chest - I know it is not the time to be selfish when so many are suffering this loss with me. always Jeremy & Sam's mom, shirley
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