This will be my second Christmas w/o mom, and my husbands and childrens first Christmas w/o his mom, their grandmother. She was the "matriarch" of Christmas. She managed and planned it, it was special for her.
My mom wasn't an alcoholic, but she had life long emotional problems that caused me a life of guilt and low self-esteem. Still, as you said, I loved her b/c she was my mom. We got as close as she would allow that last 14 months when she was so sick.
No dads left, no moms, no grandparents. The hole is huge as we are a very small family to begin with. Like you, I got through Thanksgiving, but I make no guarantees about Christmas, and I know that I won't be the only one in my family feeling this way.
Huggs,
Rainbow

It will be the 7th Christmas, my birthday (New Years Eve), and New Years without my grandparents who were more like parents + to me and its still not easy at all. I put up decorations for my husband and son crying while doing it and they weren't looking so I understand. I can't speak to my family about this either since it has split apart since the deaths of my grandparents and my husband never knew them and tells me to get over it. I guess all we can do is hang in there and hope these hard days go by fast...

thank you for your support.

I can so relate cogoalino. My mother was also an alcoholic. We had our ups and downs but she is and will always be my best friend. This was the first year I was completely alone. Christmas is just around the bend and I feel as though I can't take another minute of it. But, I will and you will too, sweetie. Hang in there. I am so sorry for your loss. Both of my parents are gone as well. I fully understand.
Big hugs to you!

this is my first Christmas without my mom also, and it's been 36years ago that i lost my little boy

This is the only place I can come to and admit my sadness. Today has been such a hard day. Life wasnt perfect but, still she was my mom. I loved her ...all of her. The good, bad, ugly. Just loved her for being nothing more than my mom.