Bereavement Support Group

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Death & Dying
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Reocurring Dreams

deleted_user
deleted_user
Hello to everyone, I've been a member with DS since early this year but for other concerns. Still I'm new to this community, it's one I put off joining for six months thinking I had everything under control. However I seem to be having some kind of delayed response to the death of my father. While I've lost others close to me the recent loss, six months ago, of my father seems to not only be lingering but getting worse.

I am okay durnig waking hours but often, usually several times a week I have vivid dreams of my father still alive. I wake emotional disturbed and depressed. Does anyone know if this is normal or not so normal?
deleted_user
deleted_user
I have heard that it is, but it has not happened to me yet. As far as having things under control, and then not so much. I was told that even when we start to feel better, sudden "waves of grief" can over take us, that is where I am today.
We all grieve differently, and maybe since you are trying to focus on getting on with things so well durring the day, your subconscience only has the night to wirk with. (?) Just a personal thought. Rainbow
deleted_user
deleted_user
I am very sorry for the loss of your father. I think that the first 6 months you are still in shock,and then everything sinks in and hits you like a ton of bricks. Well, at least that's how it was for me with the loss of my Mom and brother.
Your dreams sound very normal to me. You probably keep so busy during the day, and your mind just lets go at night. I'm sorry that you wake up so upset, but I imagine that is because once you are awake, the reality of it all sets in.
You will be in my thoughts and prayers.
Take care!
deleted_user
deleted_user
I have had dreams, but mine were not so pleasant. Why don't you try thinking that maybe this is your fathers way of letting you know that he is ok where he is, and that he is going on and you should too. And maybe I will try following my own advise.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I have had many dreams of my mother. In all of them except one she was still alive. In the one that she was dead I woke up extremely depressed and sobbing. That was when I realized mom was really gone. This past week I have had a couple of good dreams again. It makes me feel as if mom is still here and it comforts me.
deleted_user
deleted_user
normal whats normal anymore???but i too have those dreams every nite my mom died aug 10 th of panc ca and then 3 weeks later i found my dad dead in his bed.usually i dream of my mom sometimes my dad.inthen my mom is always sick and sometimes i wake up screaming .i dont know why this happens maybe the mind trying to make sense out of what happened.take care and i am so sorry for your pain and loss!take care..
deleted_user
deleted_user
This happens to me all the time. I wake up,extremly upset and grabing for my husband. I was ok when my grandmother first died. in fact i hardly had any emotion to it. which was odd cause we were extremly close. but i dont know if it is the holidays or what but i dream about her at least once a week.
But i am told this is 'normal'.
good luck.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I've had a couple of dreams too. One was of a woman telling me that if I lost all my photographs of Dad then I would lose him. Another was of me crying with Dad. I was crying and holding onto him and he was crying too but over the loss of his Dad.
Sometimes when I am on my own and my grief just seems to overwhelm me, a sudden peace seems to come over me and I will just suddenly stop crying. I like to think that Dad is with me then, comforting me. "Waves of grief" sums up exactly the feeling. Its like suddenly realisation hits me, but I just can't seem to accept it, not yet anyway.
All the best and take care.
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