I made it through the hardest part of the holiday season and I was feeling alright with my grieving process. Then I woke up this morning and was halfway through calling my grandma for our 6am prayer sessions when I realized what I was doing so I've been crying first thing this morning. I still read my bible and said my prayers but it's just not the same we've been able to have this routine at least 3 days a week for over a decade or more. I feel really lonely and sad. I know that I will get past the intensity of the pain soon enough but I have a hard time with the routines I went through the same thing when my cousin whom I was very close to died 2yrs ago. I ended up in the hospital after she passed I'm just holding on so I don't go there again. Thanks for listening I appreciate it alot.
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