Hello. I joined this community in hopes to find friends who can help me deal with the loss of my dad. He was diagnosed with lung cancer in early September. Mid-September we found out it had spread to several other places in his body (brain, skull, adrenal glands, trachea, etc.). In late September he broke his arm and they admitted him to the hospital for pain control because there was nothing the could really do for him due the a spot of cancer on his bone where it had broken. He was released from the hospital the first of October and stayed with my brother and his family. He had a visiting hospice nurse 2-3 times per week. When he was diagnosed they gave him 6 months to live. I had a hard enough time dealing with the thought of losing my dad in 6 months. My dad passed away on October 11th. The funeral was held on October 15th (my birthday). At the viewing I held myself together and greeted everyone and talked to people that were there. At the funeral I tried so hard to hold myself together, as my 9 year old was present. I just couldn't do it. I was a mess. However, since the funeral I have hardly cried. I don't understand this because I was a true daddys girl. it just doesn't seem real yet. It doesn't seem like he is gone, I mean, I know he is but its like I'm in a bad dream that I just haven't woken from. From reading thru this community I now see that I am not alone in feeling this way.
Posts You May Be Interested In
I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??