I am new here and figured I would tell my story. Just this past Christams eve, I lost my mother and best friend. She was truly my best friend and I talked to almost everyday and seen her at least once a week. She was only 53 years old. She died of a spontaneous hemorhage in her brain. I spoke to her the morning Christmas eve and she said that her left side was sore, like she slept on it wrong and it was stiff. Her youngest brother and his wife picked her up at 11:00am to drive 30 minutes to a nearby town to eat lunch with their dad and their sister. When they got there, she couldn't walk. They drove her back to the ambulance station and within 10 minutes she was in a coma. After they did a catscan, they sent her to a larger hospital in Indianapolis. When my aunt (her sister) and I got their, the doctor said she was very sick and it was unlikely that she would survive. My Mom never wanted to be kept alive by machines if there was never a chance she would be the same, so after my brother got there and we discussed it, we took her off the machines. She hung on for about 30 minutes then finally let go. I am devastated by her passing and I'm not sure what to do. She was my "person"; the one I told everything to. My life has been a complete blur since then and I have to reminding myself that she's gone. I still have moments that I want to pick up the phone and call her. Everything reminds me of her. I am constantly frustrated and moody and I can't focus on work or anything else. I'm not sure how I will get through this alone. Most of my breakdowns are during my drive home from work each day (i drive 45 minutes each way). When consumed with taking care of my 1 1/2 year old daughter and husband it's not so bad, but when at work and alone on my drive it hits hard.
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