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My Dad who was also my Best friend died from Lung Cancer 24 November last year. I only knew that he had Lung Cancer three days before he died. He had kept it a secret for years and didn't want to worry me and he didn't have any treatment.
My Mum divorced my Dad when I was a toddler and wouldn't let me see him. So as soon as it was Legal for me to trace him at 18 years old I did so and we had a great 21 years together. We were like two peas in a pod. I love and miss him dearly. He was such a proud man and always put me before himself.
My Mum has always spoken very badly about him and even now he has passed to the "Next World" she continues to do so.
I feel such a huge hole in my heart and am finding things difficult without him. It will be the 1st Anniversary of his passing 24 November.
My Dad always knew what to do and say and we talked every day on the phone and saw eachother very often.
When I need help I still go to reach for the phone as my Dad would always know what to do but now I can't.
I'm just so very sad.
Any advise would be appreciated.
Thank you.
Helen.
My Mum divorced my Dad when I was a toddler and wouldn't let me see him. So as soon as it was Legal for me to trace him at 18 years old I did so and we had a great 21 years together. We were like two peas in a pod. I love and miss him dearly. He was such a proud man and always put me before himself.
My Mum has always spoken very badly about him and even now he has passed to the "Next World" she continues to do so.
I feel such a huge hole in my heart and am finding things difficult without him. It will be the 1st Anniversary of his passing 24 November.
My Dad always knew what to do and say and we talked every day on the phone and saw eachother very often.
When I need help I still go to reach for the phone as my Dad would always know what to do but now I can't.
I'm just so very sad.
Any advise would be appreciated.
Thank you.
Helen.
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I'm so very sorry about your Dad. You must miss him so much.
Love Helen.
My Dad died in May 2007, I know how you are feeling. As Rainbow said, draw on the memories, use them every day to help get you through..I use my journal as a "phone"to my Dad..that helps me a little/lot..nothing will ever take our Dad's places, but we can at least be honored that they were our Dad's..and we are very lucky to have all those memories.
(((((hugs))))
Love Helen.
XXX
For your Mum its a bit different, but it has also been her choice to have no contact with your Dad...as you say she would of loved him at one point, she may have regrets, but again there is no reason for her to being saying anything bad about your Dad, hang in there, let her know you love her...and you also love your Dad...she will learn to keep quiet if you remind her every time.
((((hugs))))
I'm just off to bed now as it's late in England. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts with me. It has helped me very much.
Love Helen.
XXX
I remember all the good times with my Dad and most of the time I'm ok but other times I'm not. I know that he wouldn't want me to be sad. I just miss him so much. He was such a big character.
Love Helen.
XXX
Before he passed I told him that I wanted to keep him with me forever. He chuckled and said "I am", my blood runs through you everyday. Funny thing is, I am adopted, and not biologically related! BUT, he never took that into consideration, that is how close we were.
I went out and bought a small bottle of the aftershave he used to wear. When I miss him really bad, I go and spray a little - either on my hand, or on a washcloth if I am going to sleep. I find that smell very comforting.
Best wishes and hugs to you that you find comfort during this time.
Thank you.
Love Helen.
XXX