hi,i just lost my father a little less than 1 yr ago,and my mother feb.3rd of this year, i miss them so much,they both passed from cancer.father was diagnosed with prostate cancer in 1994,and it is at least a slow growing cancer, he lived with me for the last 4 yrs that he lived, he never really became bedridden or anything,and i thought i would have him a lot longer,he was doing ok, but his bowels died, and he passed within 3 days.so then his death seemed so fast.he and mother were always so loving and supportive.i am just trying to adapt to a life without them...i am thankful for all of the people here at ds,for helping me try to do that..
thank you all.i shared a little about mother too, i cannot talk about one without talking about the other...they were so special, and i am grieving for both and a brother all at once.please pray for me.
joyce

My dad was a gruff grumpy man! He had the biggest ears (it was funny and he laughed too) which he passed on to 3 of my 4 children. My daughter got the surgery done to pin back her ears. My two other sons I will leave them that way unless they ask. Dad was 62 when he died of cancer. In teh end he had it in his brain and they told me his personality may change . it didn't. His last days I spent sitting in a chair next to his bed. he never did talk much so it was just a silent visit. He was born in Georgia and my mother in law says all southerners act that way! I never had a good relationship with him as a child because he was an alcoholic. He dried up around the mid 1990's. I had trouble forgiving him for my terrible childhood. But I realized I already forgave him in August 2005 when I watched him care for my mother in her last few months. He was so sweet to her and I loved it. And in the last year of his life we became very close. I lived in PA and he lived in NV and he came to giveme away at my wedding 4 months before he died. Since I left home in 1990 (at 18) he always was there to give me a loan when I needed it. We ate Sunday dinner at his house numerous of times. He was a sweet man in the end who asked for so much peanut butter tracks ice cream that I though he would buy oout all the selection in walmart. His name was Thomas Joseph Robert Ross. I named my son after him adn my husbands step father. I put Ross as my son'd middle name. Dad named me when I was born. I love you dad and miss your grumpiness. PS He was ALWAYS a terrific grandfather, even to my step son.

i am so glad it ended well with you and your father,and i understand how him being there for your mother in the end,must have made so bitterness in your leave.that is the most important thing we can do for someone we love (i believe) is to take of them in the end.it sounds like your father was truely sorry for his mistakes, its a shame how addictions can make people do things that they never would have done other wish, and i am happy that you had the closure and forgivness you had to give to your father, not just for him but for yourself.it is so hard on us to have hard feelings against anyone.especially someone we love.my father also was very stern, but he had the biggest heart in the world.and never let a lot of people see it.but if i ever needed anything he was right there, he and my mother, i was so fortunate to have had them for as long as i did,and miss them so much.i guess that was the way the men were raised lol macho men huh? i am so glad that men are now more able to share their feelings.it must have been hard on the men before being taught to be touch and not show emotions. they were raised to be that way.thank goodness children will now be closer to their fathers i believe.

thanks for sharing your memories
joyce

i lost my dad 16months ago to colon cancer. I was in nail tech school and 8months pregant. He was told he had colon cancer in 2003.he died on feb 8th 2006. i was very close to my father. it was hard when he tried to protect me from the hurt and pain i would go through by pushing me away. Then he relized it did not help and then we got closer and i know he is in a better place but he is who i went to to talk to about everything. I miss him so much i went numb after he passed and i did not deal with it until after my daughter was born i am glade i had a great dad and that we got to spend the time with him that i did. It does not get eaiser but i am able to cope with it a lot better

thank you sweetface for this well what could i say about my dad he was the greatest even when we fought he never stayed mad long he never hit or hurt me in any way my drink whould have a drink but not to many my father loved to make people laugh he was so giving you never had to ask my dad 2 times my was in the war way before i was born i am so glad he didnt die then when my mom past away in 1992 my dad stayed with her 2 months just holding her hand day and night when there was not hope for her i miss and love both of them very much

I lost my daddy 2 1/2 years ago on Christmas Eve, I don't think the sorrow will ever go away, He was the best dad ever, I love him so.

i lost my dad january 22, 2005 in a car accident. he had 2 other daughters from a previous marriage but since they were 20 years my senior i never grew up with them. He died 4 months before i graduated highschool, and missed many (and will continue to miss many) major life steps for me. He and i argued more than anyone had ever seen, and we were both very violent, but it was because we were so similar. Anyone that knew my father would say he was generous and highly intelligent, as well as organized sarcastic, bitter, cynical, and angry. People say the same things about me. My mother took it really hard and i had to be there for her at the time. Which distracted me from ever crying (which my father did not believe in). and now 2 years later i often feel like i'm forgetting him and it hurts. i used to be highly active in my catholic faith but after all that i decided i needed a break from it. it's funny to hear people talk about their dad's, and to meet my friends' parents and know they will never know my father, versus my friends in highschool who did. it's one of the most surreal experiences i've had since his death. i miss him very much, he argued but he taught me more than anyone else ever has, and probably ever will. I always believed he'd leave me too early, and too suddenly, and sadly i was right. i often wish i could ask him questions about stupid things, or have him be the one to explain certain things to me, i could say it to him without feeling stupid (he'd call me stupid but i wouldn't care because thats how he was, anyone else would really mean it).

i'm 20 and i know he's not coming back, but if i stare at his picture for awhile it's wierd to think that the man in the photo was my father, and he's not returning.

I lost my dad a yr ago and i miss him soooooooooooooo much he was 44 and loved life so much when im with my sisters and having fun or watching a film i no he would have liked its hard i think u never get over a loss of a parent! (or anyone) u just smile and remember the good timesx

I lost my dad in January. He was 61 and just came over to visit and he died. He was great and one of the funniest people I have ever met. I really miss him.
Life will never be the same.

Hi Sweetface. I lost my Dad on the 25th July 2005. He had been diagnosed with having Myeloma, a form of blood cancer in April. He had been in & out of hospital since then. When he died he was at home all alone. I will never forget that day, one of his neighbours who had been helping him out found him and told me over the phone. My son then 8 just screamed the house down. We went to East London where he lived. we live in Essex. He was still in the house with the police thre and they were waiting for the undertakers. My son went to friends and I am so glad he did and didn't see his beloved Grandad lying there. His heart had failed in the end. I miss him so much but I do believe he is with us still in his own way. My son has stated on many occassions that his Grandad has visited him and spoke to him. The pain does lessen as time goes by but the sadness is still there and I think it will always be there. But we just try to get on with our lives the best we can and remember him with love.

Hi Sweetface My dad passed away jan. 14 2007. He was a wonderfull person and a great dad. I miss him so much. He was the kind of person that would give you what ever he had. I love him so much he tought me how to be the same kind of person he was.
Hugs
Paula

Hi sweetface, I lost my dearest dad to prostate cancer that spread i january of 2004. It takes time to heal and for the pain to lessen, but it does. We never get over losing people we have loved, but we do find "a new kind of normal life". I will always miss my dad, but i thank god that I had my father for so long and can recall so many wonderful memories. GB you and heal you. Hilly

My father died on April 10--the day after his 62nd birthday. He had been diagnosed with cancer seven years before (almost to the day). That time had its ups and downs, but the last year was pretty rough. He had several bouts of pneumonia because his immune system was so weakened; his ever-increasing medications were starting to interact badly... My mom was with him in the hospital when he stopped breathing--he was just tired.

It's still so early that for me everything is still a bit surreal. I have moments that my eyes well up with tears, just because... And moments that it doesn't seem real... And... Every day is a new lesson in dealing with grief, and trying to help the others who loved my dad (my mom, brother, other family members, close friends) do the same.

I lost my beloved Dad three months ago to cancer. No one could believe such a strong and vibrant man could be taken so quickly. He died less that six months after diagnosis. He is the finest person I have ever known. Everyone who met him, loved him because he was always kind and incredibly generous. I am having a very hard time. I thought I was getting better at coping and then I fell apart again for this entire past week.
We were very close and shared nothing but love. I know, I have always known, how lucky I was to have a father like that.
I was at his bedside when he passed. He wanted me with him while he was in hospice. The nurses told me that the few times I would go home for a shower, he would always ask for me.
His death was always my greatest fear. Somehow, listening to others on this site gives me a small measure of hope, that my life and my family's lives will get better. We will always love him and hold him close.
I guess you can tell, I could write for days about him. I thank all of you for taking time to listen and for sharing your losses with me. Somewhere, between the lines we write, I have to have faith, that healing is taking place.

I lost my father in a car accident on Apr 21, 2007. He was 56 years old. Family was always the most important thing to him, and he would do anything for us. Honestly, he do anything he could to help anybody. He like people & he liked to be able to help them. And people loved him back.

It's only been one month, so emotionally I'm all over the place. The worst are when I think of the "never-agains", like I'm never going to argue politics with him again. I sure miss him, and am trying to take it one day at a time.