my mom died on Nov. 9, 2007 of a heart attack.....it was completely unexpected....she was making a sandwich on the 7th and jus collapsed......i was living in georgia at the time and didn't make it back before she passed away....i have been in denial about it and am just recently starting to accept it.....basically i stay away from anything and anywhere that has any memories of her attached to it....its sorta worked for the past 6 months.....my parents were together for over 30 years and about 4 months after my mom died my dad informed me and my 2 brothers that he was getting remarried....needless to say that has torn wat was left of my immediate family apart big time........im the type of person that holds things in........and the eventually jus blow up.....ive noticed that since my mom passed that i have been having suicidal thoughts........and its gettin to where im starting to scare myself.....i don't think i would actually do anything to hurt myself but as people say its the thought that counts!....in my past wen i have been down ive turned to piercings cuz they caused me pain...as i am a new college student i don't have any money to go get any piercings...so i have been goin and donating my plasma cuz it causes me pain....i talked to a counselor at my college and she called the piercings and the plasma donating red flags cuz of the reason i get them and the reason i donate....my dads new wife also says the same thing........everyone is telling me to go to a doctor and get on anti-depressants......im thinking they may be right but i don't know....is there something other than pills that would help me or should i seek medical attention?
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