Its hard to know what to say. Its not unusual for people to frequent the grave of their passed love one, though. I know I have, perhaps not as frequently, but I still go. Somehow the feeling of being as physically close to my daughter as possible gives me comfort. You could start be just being there as a source of comfort and maybe she\'ll come around to what kind of help she needs on her own.

Going to grief group I hear from people who go to the cememtery every day & some who do not go at all. My husband died on Aug. 22nd & his mother has yet to go to the cemetery because she is not ready for the finality of it. I live 2 hours away from the cemetery, but every time I go back to our home town I go at least 2 times on the visit.I feel like I am closer to Chad when I am there & in a weird way it helps me deal with reality. I at first had the hopes & thoughts that he would be coming back home. And I still do at times. So going to the cemetery gives me a reality check so that I can keep doing what I have to to create a new life & future for my 3 boys & my self. Just be there for your aunt as loosing a spouse is devastating & hard to accept.

I think it depends on the person. I work very close to my stepson\'s grave and visit him on my way home when I can (2-3x a week). My husband doesn\'t seem to go as often but that doesn\'t mean he doesn\'t think about Allen. From the flowers and items left, I suspect Allen\'s mom visits only on \"special\" occasions (birthdays, Halloween ((his favorite holiday besides Christmas)) and Thanksgiving). I think it like the other lady said, the finality of it may be too much. Every time I go visit Allen though, I see a gentleman who visits his wife every day. He sits at her grave with his chair and book. He\'s retired and has the time.

I don\'t think its unusual, but I don\'t feel as much going there as I do by going to the hospital where my husband died. I have been doing volunteer work on Saturdays for a year there since he has been gone. He was there so long and suffered so much there I just feel closer to him there. Sometimes I even have to go to the floor or even the room where he died. It upsets me but It also makes me remember him more. Does that sound morbid?

People do react differently to death. My dad passed away more than 20 yrs ago and I haven\'t been to visit his grave because I feel like he would have been disappointed in me. I have been to visit my daughter\'s grave because I know how she felt about me. I knew she was just as proud of me as I am of her. I loved my father dearly but just never felt worthy.

As a bereavement counselor, I can tell you that everyone responds in his/her own way to grief. There is no \"right\" way to grieve. Some people visit the grave frequently, some never go. It\'s such a personal thing. I suggest you go if it gives you comfort. Try not to let any guilt enter the picture because there are no rules. Hope this helps.

Good book. This is especially troubling with teens. They are absolutely clueless about the risks...doing their own piercings, piercing each other, sharing jewelry, etc. My daughter has a friend who does piercings, and she was asking me if she could have this girl pierce her bellybutton. I went nuts! She says the girl "sterilizes" her needles with rubbing alcohol and by "burning" the needles with a lighter! Anyway, they do have some piercings now, but only done professionally with my permission.

I started reading this today. I'm liking what I've read so far - very helpful.

I am loving this book so much that if anyone has a Kindle, I will buy it for them! Send me a private msg with your email and I will gift you a copy.

This book is the best resource I've come across in a while, and I have about three feet of bookshelf stuffed with books about the subject.

i'm so happy you like it. I agree it is a must read! I am seriously considering seeing doctor Mullin, Hopkins is about 30 minutes away from me and he takes my insurance!

I finished the book yesterday. My takeaway from the book is that to manage IBD you have to mindfully consider EVERYTHING in your life, and it contains good advice on how to approach that monumental task. It is definitely doable.

I'm surprised I only had one taker on my offer.