so this is a first for me. i never wrote on one of theses discussion things. well its been just over 5 years since my father passed away from a massive heart attack in his sleep. i think about him every minute of every day. and i still cry all the time when i think about him. he was my best friend. we talked about everything. i miss him so much. well since he's gone i don't have anyone to talk to like i did with him. nobody understands me like he did. we were like the same person. my mom is still around but we are complete opposites and don't see eye to eye about anything. its really hard cause i want a relationship with her not like the one with my fathers but at least on a speaking level. well now i'm so lost. i was off to a good life when all this happened i had great friends i was doing well financially things were great i had my own place. now i have hardly any friends anymore. i live back at home. i'm not motivated anymore to make money cause it just seems pointless. but its been over 5 years now. i'm trying to put everything back together. what do i do first? where do i start? i hope to get this crying thing under control also. i hope i'm not giving myself to many goals. well thanx for listening or whatever. :)
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