This will be my 3rd Christmas without my first born daughter. She was still born when I was 33 weeks pregnant. We found out her heart had stopped and the long wait to deliver her (2 days) was excruitiating. Emotionally, mentally, and physically. Each holiday, I feel it gets more difficult instead of getting better. I have since had 2 beautiful children. A girl and a boy. they are 18 months apart.
My son looks a lot like my daughter that was stillborn. I dread holidays. I dread birthdays. I replay over in my mind what could have happened, what I could have done differently, but the thing is that it couldn't be prevented. It was a cord accident. Even if I knew, by the time I would have hopped in the car and began driving to the hospital, she would have been gone. Only way it could have been prevented is if they were monitoring me in the hospital and had an emergency csection. But the pregnancy was great. I had a lot of morning sickness throughout the entire pregnancy but otherwise, she was growing and striving. She was perfect. And now she isn't here.
This is going to be the 3rd Christmas...I makes me sick. I am finally seeing a therapist. Who is great. I'm on medication now. Of course I'm out of work now because I was injured at work so I'm off until at least 2/1/18. Plenty of time to sit and think about things. I need to keep busy.
Anyone else have a stillbirth?
My husband has started chewing tobacco and it’s really upsetting me! I’m not sure how long it’s been going on, because he does it secretly, but I think it’s been at least six months to a year. When I found out he told me he would stop. He didn’t. When I found more tins in his truck again, he told me he would stop. He didn’t. I spilled my guts to him, had a long (somewhat one-sided)...
I came home from university to celebrate my birthday. However, I observed that everyone in the house was absorbed in themselves. I felt alone even with people. When I showed my work, they instead chose television. I would wake up and discover the house completely empty. All that would be left would be a sticky note that read ‘Feed the chickens.’ My parents wouldn’t come back for hours....