21 yr old son died Dec 17, 2007. I was not with him when he died. My husband has moved us 5 states away from ALL extended family, friends etc. Although I attended the funeral and made all arrangements I still cannot believe it actually happened. I know it happened but even when I picture him lying there at the funeral home my heart tells me that it can't be right. He should be calling me any day now saying, " How're you doing Mom. When are you coming back to PA to visit?" My shell keeps going: keeping house, caring for my other 4 children and husband but inside I am dead. I feel no pleasure. I love all my children but I feel like I am failing them all as a parent and I just don't think this has affected any of them like it has me. They seem to get annoyed with me if we are interacting and all of a sudden I get tearful or choked up. So I have to leave or change the topic.
Posts You May Be Interested In
A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
I have my maxed amount of epidural shots of my cervical DDD....(and no one cares about my lumbar DDD)..... I've done physical therapy, muscle relaxers, Amitriptyline, Nortryptiline, desipramine.....narcotics... So I decided to go to a spine specialist and they have me on Gabapentin. Its been two weeks and it did nothing for my lumbar ever... but it did seem to help my cervical and arm/hand pain...