I hate the finality of death. It's been a month and a half, and I still don't want to accept that my mother is not coming back and that I will never see her again. Sometimes, I ask GOD to take me to heaven just so that I can be with her for a few minutes. I miss her so much. I've been able to get back to some things in life okay, but I still find myself thinking about her a lot. Her birthday is in October, coming up, and I miss that I won't see her or be able to talk to her. I miss our lunches and dinners out. I have not been able to go to those places we used to eat out at since her death. I don't know how I will. I have a good therapist who is very helpful, but the pain and realization that she's really gone forever is still excuriatingly painful.
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