when me and my john were toghether i thought i was pregnant and i wasnt i cryed and cryed we both did i wanted to be i wasnt ready for another child but i really wanted to have a child with him i have made peace (for the most part) with his death but i find myself greiveing the child we never had i dream about a little blond girl with blue eyes all the time. she allways looks the same and in my dreams her father is still gone but i have her so i am happy. i dont know what to do. i feel dumb for feeling this way.
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