Today I had time to sit here and read everyone who commented on my discussion and I noticed alot of you thought I was trying to compare and to be judgemental. Yes it came out that way to some and to others it did not. But it wasn't my intention to do so not on purpose any way. The one thing that I have gotten out of everyones comment is that it doesn't matter who died rather it was a child, parent, grandparent...so on what matters is that person that passed away the person that gave you the strength to carry on the person that you knew would love you unconditionally would be the most deepest lost possible so no matter what that lost that pain is the same. No we can not compare ourselves to those you lost a child to those you lost a parent. what matters is that we all have lost one doesn't make it worse then the others to some but to some of us it does. I was not that close to my parents so it was easier for me to deal with their death so when I was reading this I at the time did not understand my own feelings so this has made me understand why is was easier for me to lose my parents then loosing my son. Please know that I do have a heart and yes it is broken which I know many of us here have broken hearts. At times I get so angry and at times I do not understand things but I in no way was trying to tell any of you that your pain did not matter and no body should every tell you to get over it and it is your parent so on.. So if any of you felt like was was demenishing your pain I am sorry because that wasn't what I intended to do. Just know I watched my son die from cancer and for those of you who know what the treatment does to a person know I saw all of that with my son. I also saw it with my dad and my mom. But it is hard no matter what. you are all more then welcome to read my journal I have nothing to hide. But one thing I can say to all that wrote about loosing their child you are right your dreams are gone and I have no more dreams no more hope no more ambition to go forward i just live to live. but I am sorry to those that took my comment in a bad way.
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