In the past year I have experienced several losses. Three deaths and several ended relationships with friends and family. I have moved on from what I believe were toxic relationships with two of my best friends. I do not regret this, but I do feel the losses. Until the most recent death I have not felt any powerful negative emotions. The most recent was the only blood family member that I have lost, but by far not the one that I was closest to of the three. That being said, I don't believe that blood defines family, as both of my parents abandoned me in my teen years because of their drug abuse. My question is this: Why do I feel out of control? I am irritable and impatient constantly. I feel incompetent because I cannot control my thoughts or my actions. I don't know if this is "grieving" or "normal" and I don't know where to turn.
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