first of all i want to apologize for not being active on here for a while, got tied up doing halloween costumes and such along with looking for a job, pretty discouraging, getting 3 to 4 rejections a day, feeling very worthless!! then to top everything off, my birthday was yesterday which also marked the 1st year anniversary of my fathers death, had several break downs, didn't even know if i was going to make it thru, my daughter who lives in the next town came out so i had both my twin daughters with me at the same time, they really really helped me thru yesterday, don't know what i would have done had they not been there for me!!!
now on the upside of everything, i want to share something with all of you:)
the early morning hours of my birthday, i think it was around 2 a.m. pacific time i made yet another trip to the restroom, had alot of problems going to sleep knowing and dreading the 15th, but this time instead of turning on the light in the bathroom i just had the nightlight on and i caught my reflection in the mirror, but yet it didn't appear to be me, it reflected a very high hairline with age spots, so i tried to focus on it alittle closer, well when i did that i saw my dad, smiling at me in the mirror and all of a sudden i felt my left cheek get cold and i swear i heard him say "happy birthday"...of course i broke down in tears, thinking and thanking the lord for letting him come and wish me a happy birthday, then i broke down in tears...i don't care how many sceptics are out there when they hear this, i know what i saw, i know what i felt and i know in my heart it was my dad, just having that feeling inside really warmed my heart and it felt like no matter how bad things were, my dad came all of this way to acknowledge my birthday, that is something you cannot buy, you guys can only know what that means to me, some i have told felt bad because they haven't had that, its not that they haven't i feel, its perhaps they weren't ready to perceive it happening to them and it has, they don't realize it, so be perspective these times do happen to each one of us on different planes, its being open to see the messages our loved ones leave for us to find, whether it be when your fully awake or in a blur state, i am so thankful for my daughters being there for me, cause with all of the rejections for employement going on and with the anniversary of my dads death was so overwhelming for me, i know i would have done something i wouldn't be able to reverse...thanks for reading this and i will try to stay in contact with everyone more.