I sometimes have a moment in time when I wish my Grandpa was still here. Specially right now looking at his pictures. When he was told that the cancer was all over he told that he didn't have much time. I then went through my grief stages. I remember when he no longer could eat or drink. He was starving to death and that is what actually killed him, I began not eating I went from 129 pds to 96 pds. I didn't even know that I was doing this. Than I look at his pictures and wish he was back, I know he is with me I can feel him but still I want to hear his voice feel his hugs. The pain I feel for not having him hurts so much at times. I usually cry real hard and than I'm fine. Some tell me it gets better over time, sometimes I think that other times I don't think so. For eight years I was the only grandchild he had. So the bond him and me had was more special than anyone in my family had with him. He told my mom before he lost his voice that I was the only one in the family with a good head on her shoulders.
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