Here is the deal. I have worked extremely hard on helping Adam be as independent as he can possibly be. Helping himself get dressed. Going to the toilet with very little help. Eating REAL food. Sleeping by himself. Picking up after himself. It takes constant reminders and encouragement. In other words being a BIG BOY. That is how I praise him, I tell him what a big boy he is and he loves it. He WANTS to be a big boy. Here is the problem. No one else in his life treats him like a big boy. They all treat him like a baby, even his dad. When I am not in the room it all goes out the window. If I am not home, he does nothing for himself. If he is with his nanny or "that other woman" he is treated like a 2 yr old. I have told them all that they are not helping him but they are so used to treating him like a baby they just dont know any other way to treat him. It really is not all that hard. I have explained it all to them until I am blue in the face. Adam acts they way he is treated. Treat him like a baby he acts like a baby. I know they think they are being 'good' to him. It is how they show love to him, but how do I make EVERYONE understand that they are hurting his progress? I do it all, and I would do it all over again in a flash, but it seems like everytime I turn my head what I work so hard on is not important and doesnt matter. To be honest I am getting tired of starting over every time Adam visits with someone. How do I make everyone understand that he needs this to be consistent at all times? Adam can ver extremely independent if he knows he has to do it, he knows I will not treat him like a baby and he never acts like a baby around me. He is so proud of himself when he does big boy things, I do not understand why the others will not encourage him to be independent all the time. Any suggestions will help. They have got to stop regressing him. It is not going to make his life any better and frankly I think that they see me as being mean to him and I am not mean to him in any way, I never tell him he has to do anything. I talk to him about these things all the time and I make it fun for him and praise him and they even say how great he is doing now compared to 6 months ago but yet they will not enforce all my hard work. Adam would not come near me if I was mean to him, I have seen how he acts with people that I suspect may have been mean to him. I am just being a mom trying to make his life better for him. It's like, if we make him wipe his own butt then that is mean, HE KNOWS HOW PEOPLE! is that what I need to do scream it all out at them :)
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