This is a poem I wrote about having autism. Any and all comments, suggestions are wanted and appreciated.

though surrounded by thousand
loneliness threatens
to choke your precious life
loudly making its presence known
to you, to all surrounding you
creating the stifling blanket

you long to reach out
to touch another human
to feel the skin and know
you are connected to someone else
no matter the ridicule
no matter the cost
just so you know
that they know you are there
standing in the middle of their chatter
wrapping you in a blanket
of their own making

though you know this is pointless
they know just what they do
just where you stand
how else would they know to throw that can
throw that punch
hurl those words
at what they consider wasted space
wasted air and earth

you long to see what others see
yet though nothing blocks your sight
you cannot see what they see
as they see
for your mind is blocking you
from being just like them

glimpsing a picture hang above
you announce what you see
full of awe and wonder
radiates in your tone
the people just hiss
laugh and point at you
for you are wrong
for you are confused
they say
so certain, so proud
for you dont see what is
right there
right in front of you

bowing down you head
you slowly slink away
the crowd is starting
to grow smaller in numbers
yet still they seem to take
away your breath of life

shadows close in
frightening, worrying you
though certain that you will soon suffocate
you know it is all in you mind
noises grow louder and louder
till you want to shrink and scream
can no one else hear
the thunder booming all around
deafening
yet you keep silent
knowing no one else can hear
just what you hear

alone
you are alone
seeing what you
only see
hearing what you
only hear
smelling
tasting
feeling
what you only
smell
taste
feel

how long have you wished upon a star
whatever happened to dreaming
means achieving
hard work means
rewards later on

Autism happened and stole away
the promise hand out
to all but you
when their first birthday came around
empty, you are entitled
to no dreams
no wishes upon a star

Autism envelops you,
crowns out reason,
sometimes sanity

Autism leaves no visible marks-
just scars buried deep

Autism allows you no normalcy
no ability to read the same
as others read
what is written upon the faces

Autism changes your vision
you never know what you see
what you hear
what you feel
is real and true
or if it is false and unreality filled

yet, Autism is a fight in disguise
all the obstacles
fought with your soul
fought against for you life
all the contradictions
you face down
day after day
allows a freedom
a freedom no one else knows
no one else realizes

once you have embraced Autism
Autism envelopes you
in a different sort of world
where nothing is as is seems
allowing you thoughts
allowing you ideas
no one else has dared
to have had before
Autism may leave no visible marks,
just scars buried deep
you can round up
all that pain
all that turmoil
to help others see
just what you see

Autism allows no normalcy
but why should you care
for in this world
full of insanity
in this place of contradictions

Autism allows you
the escape
the freedom
available to only a special few
those labeled different
those labeled weird
those labeled nerds
those labeled autistic.