My son is 14, he was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 4 and by the age of 6 it was evident that something else was just not quite right. Our pediatrician made an appointment with a neuropsychologist several hours away and she was wonderful. She was incredibly informative and patient. She gave me a pamphlet on Asperger's and after I read it said, "Do you think your son might have AS?" I was in denial and said, "No." I kept that pamphlet and remained in denial until he was 8. At the age of 8 it was evident that he had AS. He was notorious for engaging in long-winded, one-sided conversations without noticing if you were listening to him or trying to change the subject, he could not maintain eye contact, had few facial expressions, was rather flat in his affect, and had awkward body postures/gestures, he completely lacked the ability to read other people or to empathize with them, he stumbled over his words and spoke unusually fast (to the point that it was impossible to follow a conversation with him), and he could not understand that not everyone was fascinated by military weapons and military history (at least not to the point that he was). He was in public school and everyone was so mean to him, even the teachers were cold and cruel to him. It didn't take long before anything that went wrong at school was automatically his fault. I hated this, but it seemed like he didn't notice and as long as he didn't notice, then I guessed that no harm was really being done. Then one evening we were at a Mardi Gras carnival at his school when he was 9 years old. At the carnival I noticed how cold everyone was to him and I was heartbroken, but he and I just carried on like nothing was wrong, and I tried my best to give him a great evening. I thought I was successful until, on the way home, he looked at me and said, "Mama, why does everyone hate me so much?" I was stunned! I had no idea that he was picking up on it. I said, "Nobody hates you baby!" and he said, "Yes they do. They just think I am to dumb to notice, so they think it's OK to be mean to me. I think they think I am retarded." I cried so hard that night, and I prayed for my precious baby. I felt like a horrible parent. I will never forget it. It still makes me cry today. I pulled him out of public school soon after that and tried to homeschool him, but he could not understand why he couldn't have down time whenever he wanted since he was at home and home was where down time happened. As an answer to much fretting and prayer, God led our pastor to open a private school at our church. It has been the biggest blessing in our lives. I want to take this time to thank God again for the blessing of Bentley Christian Academy. Anyway, my son is now 14 and still has all of the previously mentioned character traits. But now (no doubt due to his age) he is starting to lie a lot. His area of special interest is the same it has been since he was 3 years old- military weaponry. Which, by the way is a terrible area of special interest to have when you are in public school. They treated my poor baby like he was the next unibomber! Those sorry suckers! He used to read all the time, and I had to monitor the History Channel because that is all he wanted to watch. But now, he seems content to just make junk up instead of really trying to research things and learn. He spouts stuff off that makes him sound like he is just full of crap. And as a result he often gets told that he is full of crap. I hate this. His self esteem is low and he has a lot of anxiety, yet he will not take anyone's advice that would help him be more accepted and validated. I don't know what to do. I feel like he is verbally abused because it is constantly being told to shut up, and because his area of special interest is not a popular subject he is constantly treated like his interests, feelings, and thoughts are stupid and aggravating for everyone. I don't want the reactions of others to damage his self worth, and I see it happening. I really don't know what to do. He does wear everyone out. I try to keep up with him, but I have diabetes, lupus, fibromyalgia, and chronic fatigue syndrome, and he just absolutely wears me out. I love him so much, and I see such sweetness, intelligence, and creativity in him. I tell him that, but because I am mom, and he is a teen, my opinion doesn't seem to hold any value to him. Please pray for us, and any advice in this matter would be greatly appreciated.
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