Why would somebody cut off a friend in an aspie group. Pretty strange given aspie circumstances.

No, it was Ok. I heard back that they were just tailoring down their list as it had grown and they wanted a specific group of contacts. I think it would be good to be able to organise your friends into folders like in email, sort friends as to; people I must keep an eye on; people that have sent hugs; people that I've noticed in passing and would like to find out more about when I have time; that sort of thing ...

I just found out today at parent-teacher conference that my daughter's only friend at school (the only one she has made in two years) has just moved away. No wonder she has been so sad and confused lately. It is tough when friends move on.

It can be worse for us, 'my' butcher left and headed of for a new job; same meat, same store, different face - left me totally disorientated! Same, same 'my' waitress left the coffee shop - I find it hard to see new faces. My best wishes are with your daughter, I'm 48 and I still take it personal that people move on and 'leave' me.

Yes, my daughter is the same way with not seeing faces some times. She thinks a friend of my husband's is her bus driver because they both have black hair and a goatee. She used to call all of her therapists "Rachel" because she had a therapist named that once. So, as you can imagine, she is a little disoriented about her only friend leaving. This has been a tough year for her, new teacher, her TA left abruptly and switched to another program, new speech therapist, lots of changes. She is not so good with changes.

As long as I don't talk too much or interact too 'deeply' I do okay but usually my friends leave. But I'm lucky I have one friend and one loyal kind of spouse. It's hard not to think over a certain number of years that it's your fault.

This is really interesting to me, because when I was much younger, I felt the same way. Maybe it's because my parents divorced in my mid twenties, and basically my whole past disintegrated within the next few years. By the time I reached the age of twenty eight, I was married and divorced myself, and everyone I knew had only been in my life for a few short years.

A couple of years later, I left my hometown and never went back, or contacted anyone I knew there. Now I've been in a different town for the past fifteen years, and since I've been here, haven't really developed any close friendships except with my wife.

For the past sixteen years, I've been the one that left, and the few people I'm closest to, basically my Dad and his wife, don't even live in the same place anymore.

I guess for some of us, whether we like change or not, it is forced on us so suddenly, brutally, and for so long a period we become jaded to it? Or, like in my case, maybe we force it on ourselves.

I am watching my kids go through it now though, for the first time, and it reminds me that I too once clung to the past and found change hard to deal with. My Dad and step mother just moved from the only house my kids ever knew them to live in.

it was quite the melancholy experience watching them look around the empty apartment. It was a little strange for me too. The house itself is the last bastion of childhood memories for me and many other people in our family including my father.

It's to be sold next spring. I guess the saddest thought for me is that because of the many many places, people and memories that have come and gone in my life, I doubt very much that I'll shed one tear over it.

Now the only reason I hate change is if it means I have to move again. I'm getting too old to lift the furniture.

Guess you could say I got that "cleansing" a long time ago.

But you know what? I'd give anything to get some of that baggage back.

Wait, I think I see some in those boxes across the room. The ones I got from my mother's after she passed away. The ones I put there two years ago full of pictures I'm going to scan and put on a web site for my extended family, who I've barley spoken to over the past twenty-five years, to enjoy.

Someday.

Maybe it's time for a different kind of cleansing now.

SP

I was four when I made the conscious decision to never really be close to anyone again. My parents moved us from Md to Il, and I remember making that call. Sad for such an early age. But, I remember the thought process and decision clearly, as well as the picture of the mountains that I saw from the car window as it was made.

Perhaps soon I will find someone in which it matters that they are truly in my life or not.

This thread is particularly interesting tome, at this moment. I will be going to our 50th high school reunion next week. I graduated May 28th, 1958 and left for the Army on June 4th. I haven't seen any of these people since.

If I can control my upchucks and twitching, I think it is going to be fun to observe this event. FirstInLine has promised to keep a close eye on me.

Pops

Mois a faux pas no quelle shocke Zuit Allors, Oui.