I have a 4 almost 5 year old son with Asperger's who is doing well now but as a infant and toddler was really difficult. I also have a daughter almost 3 and another daughter almost 1. Having 3 children this close together is difficult for anyone but right now I am really having a hard time because my husband has Asperger's too. What I thought were cultural differences actually turned out to be Asperger's. He has many great qualities but the not so great ones are really wearing me down. He was born in raised in Africa by a fanatically religious family. He was often beaten, many times to blood if he didn't follow his father's demands. He is one of 28 children so he got no one on one time. I think all of these problems turned what could have been a mild form of Asperger's (like my son)into a really complex problem. He has no understanding of my feelings and gets mad and verbally abusive easily. I am coping with the idea that this is how my life will be but I need advice from any other spouse of an Aspie on how to change me because it is obvious he won't or can't. How do I let go of all the hopes I had and move on to better navigate through my reality? I don't want to blame him or myself I just want for us to move on to a better future.
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