Arthritis Support Group

Rheumatoid arthritis is a chronic, inflammatory, multisystem, autoimmune disorder. It is a disabling and painful condition which can lead to substantial loss of mobility due to pain and joint destruction.

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pain and being so mean

deleted_user
deleted_user
I am in pain so much of the time and none of the meds help at all anymore. I am grumpy all the time and get downright mean at the worst. I also have mood disorder but those meds don't even seem to help. I try to keep my lip buttoned but sometimes I feel like I will explode if I cannot vent. I do vent here, but some days it takes every ounce of reserve I have to type a message or two. I go from zero to 180mph in 5 seconds and I feel so out of control. I never know whether to laugh or cry at myself. I yearn for the days when a single vicodin would make me feel good, no pain...kind of high but completely in control of myself (except I couldn't drive)now it is norco every 5 or 6 hours and nothing. I have carpral tunnel on top of cmc arthritis in both hands. My 1st surgery for carpral is next week and I wish it had been yesterday. I can't help the pain like I wish I could but I know I could stop being so mean but I don't know how. I feel bad after I blow up but I get so damned mad about everything. I don't get much, if any, support from the family. They all know I have pain but no one will even try to help me out a bit, to make it easier. All I do is work work work until my hands and arms feel like they're going to fall off. Yeah I know, poor poor me, but if no one gets the picture reallly really soon where are they gonna be in a week? Hell I don't even know how I will be able to help myself for the first few days, guess I will go fill the freezer with more of the same junky frozen dinners so at least I can eat. Awwwwww I feel somewhat better already just b'ing about it here. But I know if anyone understands it is you guys. I get so tired, and feel so mean and there are times I know if my hands weren't so painful I would start knocking the snot out of someone just so they would listen. This is exhausting, I am going to go try and pour some juice without spilling it all over myself and go enjoy the rest of the afternoon, it has been very temperate and nice so I am going to go sit next to my parrot until it is time to bring him in before his poor little feathered body gets cold when the sun starts to set.
thanks for the vent....take care
deleted_user
deleted_user
I know how you feel and hope when you have surgery you'll feel better..just know you're never alone...
deleted_user
deleted_user
oh goodness yes, it really HELPS, doesnt it to have a vent. I certainly do..lol...but I honestly so much feel for you, in the hands as wrists it must be more than frustrating no wonder you lash out sometimes...hug to you...Cathrynn X (ps does your parrot parrot a vent every now and again?)!
deleted_user
deleted_user
Thanks, I am sure once I have the surgeries I will start to feel much better. I bought tickets to see Terry Fator, the ventriloquist who won Americas Got Talent, as a present for myself and I am excited about that and hope for the couple hours I am there I forget about the pain. I know I am not alone out here in DS land. And yes, my parrot parrots back at me too. He starts whooping, I whoop back at him. Next thing you know were trading insults LOL. Actually he is good therapy...not only does he talk he thinks...hinest. Yesterday he added a word to his standard How are you? to How are you today? and last night...I kid thee not...I walked past him, he yelled Hey! Where is everybody? He hears that all the time but to have him say it was so damn funny. He is exploring his new cage, which is 3x the size his other one. Now that cage is outside for him to use during the nice afternoons. He is very quiet when outside but as soon as he gets in he sounds off. I truly appreciate everyone out here. I need to find something to eat, not too hungry yet but if I wait too long I will succumb to junk food. Only trouble is, there isn't anything BUT junk food here. Another thing that is difficult to do, grocery shopping. But this week sometime I am going to have to grab one of the people around here and go do it. Take care everyone....lorelei..p.s. I still am feeling mean but a lot of that is pure boredom I think.
deleted_user
deleted_user
HI, I can relate to ur pain, i,ve tried everything for pain, i have rheumotoid arthritis, most pain meds make me sick, i don,t take anything for pain, i have it in my fingers, my neck my knees and my hips, i fall all the time, can barely walk somedays, i know ur surgery will greatly help, i have a bird too, her name is desparado, i wish she talked i,ve had her sixteen years, but she is good company for me, she still bites me the little booger, but i love to whistle cause she whistles back, and when i cover her up a nite i say nite, nite, and she,ll go tweedle dee! good luck to ya, WILDTHING!
deleted_user
deleted_user
I get extremely moody. I have RA with painful ankles and feet. My mom has Osteo. Sometimes she doesn't stop asking for favors. I know how she feels and I want to help but when the pain hits a certain point, I lose it. I've been working hard on trying to explain to her that we need to schedule things so I can plan my day out and don't pass my threshold. I feel horrible. I'm nice, I'm nice, I'm nice and then I notice I'm passing that pain point and I get mean.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Pain will definitely test your patience and your tolerance. Anger and irritation with others though isn't about pain.
deleted_user
deleted_user
It may not be about pain but the pain can push you over the edge. It may be that isn't about pain but then why does it come up for so many people only when they are in pain? Maybe because the other issues aren't problems until you have to deal with the pain too. Now your other issues have to move up on the priority list and sometimes too abruptly for you to have realized. Sometimes you may be a step behind. In my opinion that is when the irritabilty shows up.
Just my opinion, I could be wrong.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I have only intermittent pain, not all the time. However, last week my shoulder was hurting very much indeed and I also had a bad UTI infection & had gone to the doc for antibiotics. I went into a shop nearbye, feeling really ill and usually, I put a few things on the counter, then wander round the tiny shop, bringing them back to the counter as it hurts my shoulder a lot to carry a basket (too small for trolleys, this shop)....a woman who I hadnt seen there before refused to let me put the basket on the counter because of clutter. Now, I do understand this, in this particular shop but, with all this pain and feeling unwell I was REALLY bad tempered about it. I complained and grumbled under my breath and went off in a mood. This is really really unlike me!!! this is what the pain did, it was the pain talking! However, I did go back a couple of days later and apologised...there was another assistant there at the time of this who I know well, and she understood completely. If I hadnt apologised I could never have gone back! So I really do understand how pain can make you grumpy - even if that is not your natural self - pain most of the time with arthritis must be terrible.......I am so sorry you have to put up with this, take great care..hugs Cathrynn X
deleted_user
deleted_user
Believe me Cathryn I have done my fair share of apologizing. But sometimes people don't give a hoot no matter what. I had a bad experience at the grocery store a couple months back, and let the mgr know exactly how I was treated. I also have not been back since, I was going slow packing my groceries and all I got was dirty looks...like the hand splints I wear are a fashion statement. So my money goes to their competitor now and I told them so too. Anyway the other grocery is so good, they make sure I get my bags taken to my car even if I only have a few, sometimes when it is busy I tell them I can handle it. I just make sure they bag the stuff lightly and that helps a lot. As long as I can get help most times getting it loade din the car that is one thing the family helps me with. Well I been stalling for time, it is time to go...were seeing a show tonight and have to pick tickets up at box office and I need to stop by bank quick...a little gambling money LOL...thanks...lorelei
deleted_user
deleted_user
I also get very grumpy in shops - We have basket-only check-outs where we used to have 10 items or less checkouts - Strong, fit people can get a hell of a lot of items in a basket - I have to use a trolley for just a few items (although pushing a trolley also causes some pain)....If I have less than 10 items I sometimes go to 'basket' checkouts - I'm waiting for the day someone challenges me and I'll tell them what for "It is not my fault that I am in pain and cannot carry a basket" I will say (probably very loudly and forcefully!)LOL
deleted_user
deleted_user
One trick I've learned is to warn the people around me that I am having a bad day. Then they say if I get mean they'll just lock me in my room.
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