anyone have any tips or suggestions???

Parties are difficult when you don't know anyone. I try and think ahead of time about what to say to people. I just remember that most people like to talk about themselves. So to get any sort of conversation started, try to ask them questions regarding themselves. Look interested even if your not and kind of deal with it that way. As I usually tell everyone I'm not the best advice giver but I just tell what I do in these similar situations.

i used to be very withdrawn in social situations and unless my boyfriend was right beside me, i would panic if i was around strangers. I got over it slowly, by deciding that i was going to force myself to be uncomfortable. I went to a meetup in my city alone and I just did a lot of breathing excerises the whole drive there. Pep talked myself in while I sat in the car, scared to go inside. And then went inside and tried to talk to people like I would like other people to talk to me. I was so proud of myself for doing something I thought would be impossible and it seemed like people liked me which gave me a huge confidence boost. But yeah... scariest thing I have ever done, but now I am comfortable around people I don't know :) And yeah, I really did used to have panic attacks around strangers and have to run from the room.

Hi, Ozfrog!!!!
I wish I had more to offer you, but I'm pretty much the same way myself.
My daughter got married 2 weeks ago and it was all I could do to drag myself there. Of course, I had relatives to sit with, which makes a Hell of a big difference. But I was dreading it too, because it was the first time I was going to see my exhusband since our divorce in 2004. Wasn't much looking forward to THAT!!! And a certain amount of focus was on me, as the mother of the bride, which I didn't much care for, either.
Sigh. When I have to do these things, I 'fake' it the best I can. Smile as though nothing horrible is going on inside me and just say 'Hi' and introduce myself to people, when I have to. If you do end up in conversation with someone else, ask them questions that focus on them. Ask them what they do and no matter what the answer is, say "Wow!!! That sounds interesting! What's that like and do you like it?"
What I try to do to calm myself is this (and once again, I'm sorry, but it ain't much!):

I keep reminding myself that everyone is much more focused on themselves than they are on ME. (It's true, too!!! Hell, you probably won't even be the only one there with social anxiety!!)
Ahead of time, even if it's a week ahead of time, anytime I start getting nervous about it, I tell myself, "Well, on November 8th at 10:00 pm (or whatever date and time applies), all this will be over with!"
That actually helps me, as stupid as it sounds!!
And I remind myself of all the past, wretched things that I somehow managed to live through and do my best to realize that this will soon fall into that category -- something that is overwith.
If the radio or music in your car will help take your mind off of what lies ahead, then crank it up.
I'm 54 and have been dealing with this my whole life and the only thing I can tell you is that it has gotten a bit easier to endure, over time.
Sorry if none of this sounds of any use to you, but it's all I've got!!!
Good luck!!! I hope it all goes as well for you as is possible!!!!

oooh, another big tip. I came up with an escape plan before I went inside. I decided the worst possible scenario for me was that people were mean and didn't like me. I decided that I would just walk out and leave and never see them again if that happened, and even if it was embarassing, it wouldn't matter because I didn't know them. You can do a version of this too, but I would talk to your friend about it first, so you know she'll be supportive even if you have to leave abruptly. I'm sure you'll be fine though once you get in there.

Bring out the actress in you. Fake it until you make it is a wise saying. Keep a smile on your face ( releases feel good chemicals) whether you feel like it or not. Ask questions and listen intently. Simple things, like "do you live around here?" Or "how do you know such & such?" People love good listeners.
try to relax and have fun !

I try to kinda psych myself out - do the things that day that I know give me some confidence, bring something with me to fiddle with if I feel like I dont know who to talk to, and kinda fake myself out that I feel okay. It is good to just ask people about their jobs or whatever and let them talk if you feel too nervous. Remember lots of people feel nervous in social situations so you are probably not the only one there that feels that way.