I'm taking it day by day hour by hour but the feeling of fogginess and being disconnected from the world is a very serious issue for me, I'm taking my xanax and been on lithium and seroquel, my workload is changing as well as the kids school schedules, I'm praying I get through thisbut i'm missing life and it's been so long since things were right for awhile I get a good few days and then wham...i'm scared but have no choice to keep going until god decides to change things, I feel like my heart is going to just stop or pass out on the street walking how strong are we really???? am I ever going to feel like I'm apart of this world??
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I know that I have repressed memories of some sort of sexual abuse from when I was young. But then I also have more recent sexual abuse (about 2 years ago) that I remember vividly and I hate all of it. I hate not knowing but also knowing. I just want to forget all of it completely. It makes my life so awful.I've tried just about everything but I feel like I can't get close to my fiance because...
I've tried to meditate but had to stop because anxiety was threatening to overwhelm me and I started shaking.I have nothing to be frightened of. All the frightening things in my life happened when I was a child/adolescent. I'm 37 years old now and none of the people who hurt me can hurt me now.Can childhood fears perpetuate forever? Will I spend the rest of my life being scared of ghosts?