I have had an "on the edge of a panic attack" feeling for several days... a week maybe? I feel like I'm just going to lose it. Right now I just keep trying to control my breathing, but then I just break down and start crying. The only thing working for me right now is distracting myself with a movie, sleeping, being online and not thinking, etc. But I have a research paper due tmrw morning that I've barely done any of, but every time I try to do it, I start panicking. This has been happening all week. I'm not on medication right now, but obviously need to be, only I don't have a doctor here yet, so I would have to go to a walk-in place that I'm sure my new insurance won't cover. I'd call and ask, but the thought of talking to a stranger on the phone right now, sends me into a panic. Also, the thought of leaving the house right now, makes me pretty nervous too. Not to mention, I have a makeup test for a class at 2:30 that I have to go to, public speaking class at 6 and i have to give a speech in it tonight, and this paper to write. If I leave the house now, I might not get my paper done. If I don't turn in this paper tmrw, the resulting zero will cause me to fail the class, and I had an A in this class, so I really don't want that. Not to mention I had a grant for school this semester which will be taken back if I drop or fail a class. I absolutely don't know what to do anymore. I've been struggling with my anxiety big time for a month and a half now, but can't ever find free time to find a Dr. But I really can't take it anymore.
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