Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
I have had a day from hell. I suffer from anxiety and am newly diagnosed. I have recently come to realize that I also am dealing with a nasty case of Separation Anxiety.
I don't do well alone, never have. I was adopted as a child and even though I grew up in a very loving home with Parents who love me to pieces I deal with the rejection at the hands of my birth mother.
This has manifested itself in most if not all of my adult relationships, I am 31 and have been married and divorced twice. I am currently in a relationship with a man whom I adore dearly. He loves me and my childen (9&11). However I hate the days that I am without him.
We have been living together for the past 18 months and there have been situations in our history together that have made me doubt his faithfulness and honesty. We are trying to get thorough them but it is hard especially since I have this damn GAD.
I tend to obsess over the details and when things don't add up I call him on them. He gets defensive and I get angry and the conversation goes nowhere but in circles.
I have had a hard time dealing with the night school courses he has been taking (1 per semester) It equals one night a week that he is gone. He leaves for work each day before I am up and is usually home by 6 each night, except on school night. These nights he is in school until 9pm and home by 10. He has taken to going to his parents to visit on these nights as well which of course delays him coming home from anywhere from a half an hour to 2 hours. I can't cope with it. His family and I do not have a great relationship, most of them if not all of them have some issue with me for one reason or another.
So tonight was a school night, I tried, I really did, to take it easy, to try and keep in control of my thoughts and feelings but I failed, and miserably. I asked him about a girl in his class that he has mentioned on more than one occassion and if or if not he finds her attrctive (we have dealt with some faithfulness issues. That got right out of control when he twisted my words and said "well she isn't bad looking". Well okay then. I then asked a few other questions pertaining to her and he got defensive saying that he wasn't looking to score etc.
In the midst of all this arguing he throws it at me that he is oing to his folks'lace to see his sister (I thought, this week was gonna be different as his Mom is overseas). I was all syked up to see him early tonight and nope that couldn't happen. He told me 10 or 15 minutes. Well that passed 10 minutes ago, and I am in another spiral downwards. I hate the control this disorder has. I am on meds and yet most days it seems to let me coat by Tuesdays are insane. I know I could take my Clonazepam but then I would be out cold and I would not see him at all. So at best he won't be home for another half an hour (time between his parent's and our house). Sorry for the rant but I needed to vent.
I don't do well alone, never have. I was adopted as a child and even though I grew up in a very loving home with Parents who love me to pieces I deal with the rejection at the hands of my birth mother.
This has manifested itself in most if not all of my adult relationships, I am 31 and have been married and divorced twice. I am currently in a relationship with a man whom I adore dearly. He loves me and my childen (9&11). However I hate the days that I am without him.
We have been living together for the past 18 months and there have been situations in our history together that have made me doubt his faithfulness and honesty. We are trying to get thorough them but it is hard especially since I have this damn GAD.
I tend to obsess over the details and when things don't add up I call him on them. He gets defensive and I get angry and the conversation goes nowhere but in circles.
I have had a hard time dealing with the night school courses he has been taking (1 per semester) It equals one night a week that he is gone. He leaves for work each day before I am up and is usually home by 6 each night, except on school night. These nights he is in school until 9pm and home by 10. He has taken to going to his parents to visit on these nights as well which of course delays him coming home from anywhere from a half an hour to 2 hours. I can't cope with it. His family and I do not have a great relationship, most of them if not all of them have some issue with me for one reason or another.
So tonight was a school night, I tried, I really did, to take it easy, to try and keep in control of my thoughts and feelings but I failed, and miserably. I asked him about a girl in his class that he has mentioned on more than one occassion and if or if not he finds her attrctive (we have dealt with some faithfulness issues. That got right out of control when he twisted my words and said "well she isn't bad looking". Well okay then. I then asked a few other questions pertaining to her and he got defensive saying that he wasn't looking to score etc.
In the midst of all this arguing he throws it at me that he is oing to his folks'lace to see his sister (I thought, this week was gonna be different as his Mom is overseas). I was all syked up to see him early tonight and nope that couldn't happen. He told me 10 or 15 minutes. Well that passed 10 minutes ago, and I am in another spiral downwards. I hate the control this disorder has. I am on meds and yet most days it seems to let me coat by Tuesdays are insane. I know I could take my Clonazepam but then I would be out cold and I would not see him at all. So at best he won't be home for another half an hour (time between his parent's and our house). Sorry for the rant but I needed to vent.
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theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
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I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
PS:
If you aren't seeing a counselor, you might want to look into it. They can teach you how to calm yourself when you're panicking and help you deal with the anxiety.
Good luck and blessings
Marigold.
But at the end of the day, you have to find your own way through this.
For instance i wrote my self a contract of what I wasl allowed to do and how I was going to deal with things positively. So when the next spiral down hits, and I forget everything I ever thought I was going to do, I can look at my contract and it tells me what to do and say.