All the tears, all the loneliness, losing touch with reality. Trying to hang on and use self talk that it's just not me that's without employment.... I'm well aware of this. But it doesn't help anymore. Why am I here? God supposedly has a purpose for us all being here... well, what is it??? To suffer? To be idle. I'm rotting. I feel like I serve no purpose. I cannot keep going like this. It's not healthy and is driving me nuts. I'm fed up with applying and applying online and in person AND nothing. I don't want to be idle anymore and I can't. I'm hysterical. It's not my fault, but it's finally gotten the best of me. I volunteer, I see friends.... but why bother? I feel hopeless and beyond discouraged. Thank u all for the help... but I just don't see a point anymore to all of this.
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