Basically on new years of this year i had been drinking the night before. I hopped into the shower the next morning and within 2 minutes of being in there i started feeling my heart begin to race, from there went the shaking, then the dizziness then came the shortness of breath, the hyperventilating, the fear of passing out and then the ambulance. after they left telling me i was having a panic attack and it would pass, i began to start it over again. i went to the hospital and was having the most severe attack i have ever had in my life feeling so much fear that i cant even explain it. after hours of shaking and being terrified they gave me Atavan, i was hesitant to take it because i am against pills and medicines and never react well to them. so of course after taking the med i began to feel drunk, started hallucinating, crying uncontrollably, was afraid to sleep/close my eyes thinking i wouldnt wake up. so i went back to the hospital. after it wore off i was back to my normal self joking with the doctors about what had happend to me. but ever since then and being told that i had an actual "disorder" i have had panic attacks off and on. they have not been as bad as the first but they are enough to interrupt my life. i have talked to many people doctors or not and they all seem to tell me basically the same saying i need to take meds to help me relax but i am a stubborn kid and believe that i am strong enough mentally and physically to rid of these attacks without any assistance from drugs of any kind. there isnt really a certain thing that starts the attacks its mostly just the thought that i am going to have an attack or that i have come down with some strange sickness. my biggest fears that bring these attacks on and then increase due to the attacks are the feeling of loosing my vision and the fear or passing out. i am terrified by the thought of passing out. anyway thats my story any suggestions would be great. thanks.
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