I worked until July when I was unjustly fired. Long story and it just upsets me, so I won't go into it.

Every single day was a struggle. There were days when I litterally had to drag myself in and fought panic attacks all day long. How did I get through it?? I have no idea.

I am dreading getting another job because I know what it's going to be like. I have never heard of anyone being on disability for panic/anxiety. The way Ohio is, probably couldn't get it anyway.

Thanks for your reply. I just can't imagine. And yes, severe panic disorder and anxiety IS a disability, but it's not governed by your state. Social Security is thru the national government. It has nothing to do with Ohio, VA, NC, or individual states.

I just can't imagine going in and working 9-5 every day. I couldn't do it. I opened my own business a year ago because I'm not one to sit around and collect a social security check for disability. The store is doing great, I loved it, but now I'm feeling "trapped"........... already.

Yes I'm still on disability, and I can make up to $600/month with no repercussions. This store was my "new journey", a new start. I thought I could do it. I'm learning very quickly after one year that I just can't.

But even if I sell my store, I will do other things, but things that I can do at my own pace. I can ebay, I can design websites, I can stage model homes by decorating, I make candy bouquets, I could even go into a flea market and sell things. But none of those things would "suffocate" me or make me feel "chained". It's the "chains" that are sending me into this wild panic attacks again. That and about a million other things.

But I KNOW without a doubt that I cannot work a full-time job, with other people, every day again. I come up for review for my disability in May. I come up for review every 3 years. Talk about anxiety! What if they tell me I can work? Yeah whatever............. I'll just end up sleeping in a box under a bridge overpass.

That life I once knew for all those years is long gone............... and I don't see how some of you do it. I WANT to do it. I even opened the store WANTING to do it. I'm my own boss. I do everything the way I want them done. No one to tell me what to do, how to do it, etc., and I'm still failing because I'm chained to that store. I need to be doing 100 things at once, when I want to do them and at my own pace. If I'm down from a panic attack, the kinds of things I'm hoping to do later, those are the kinds of things that can wait a few days. My store can't wait. I have to be there every day. If i have to close my store, there are no sales that day. If I don't make sales, there is not rent money.

All of this, every bit of it, is just totally ridiculous. I feel like Dorothy. I just want to click my heels together and go back to where I was. I don't know how I got here or what happened to me, but I want it fixed. I raised 2 kids by myself, was a rape victim, was a victim of child molestation, and a few other things. Yep, had therapy for those things and dealt with them all before this started. I got thru all that.............. it's not the past that paralyzes me, it's the PRESENT. I just can't make heads or tails out of it.......... and I can't make heads or tails out of how any of you can get up every day and go to an office and deal with the same people every day. But I envy you.

I didn't qualify but now i'm able to work a little.

I have been working for two and a half years, for the most part its a distraction from my anxiety, but when it gets really bad i have to take time out, i took 3 weeks off some time ago and have now been off for 2 months due to family issues and anxiety but i didn,t tell work about the anxiety part, im able to hide it just up untill absolubte crash point.
Luckily they like me and i will be going back mid december but am concerned at some point it will happen again.
Im a permanent residident alien in the US but not not a citizen yet so dont think i would be able to qaulify for disability.
Im not sure i can give you any answers to this.
Do you have anyone that could run store for you for a while untill you can get things back under control?.
Do you have a doctor and therapist and do you take meds to help?.
If you have family near by are they a good support network for you?, could you move in with them for a while whilst you get your buisiness started?.
GoodLuck To You And Take Care!
Hugs

Wow. I feel like I'm headed in the same direction as you. I moved away from my entire family to another state for the job I'm currently at. I've been with this same company for 7 years but lately the pressure has become horrible and then all the anxiety and panic started. They've been letting me work from home for about 4 months now. I could barely leave the house at first and now I'm doing better, but I've already been told I may not have a job at the end of the month. I have no idea what to do. I feel just terrible that I'm putting my wonderful husband through all of this. I wish I had an answer for you. I don't know how it happens or why or why to certain people. It sucks.

I haven't worked since January, I just can't handle the stress related issues and don't want to discuss with an employer the problem because that would make me vulnerable, so poof I just disappeared!

HEy LinDuh! I dont work, but I go to night school. It was always hard for me to concentrate in night school; every lil sound would make me reread a sentence 15 times. I felt I would never finish and graduate on time. BUT, I got my dad to buy me an ipod and I listen to soothing music the whole time and it makes me concentrate SO much better!

I don't know how I work. I work because I have to. I have to pay my rent, my utilities, my student loans etc. I did not know one could be on disability for panic disorder and anxiety. My therapist asked me how I can work. I thought she was trying to tell me that I don't have anxiety because it doesn't interfere enough with my work. Then again, I was always wary of what she asked me. When I'm having a bad day I tell my supervisor I feel ill. I go home. I don't explain the details to anyone. I'm afraid my supervisor will think I am not willing to work.

Im on disability..two & half yrs in..still no near future hopes..panic disorder initially, then BP..Panic disorder induced from unrecognised mania..Lithium has helped me..

I work and I actually find that I feel better working and getting my mind off anxiety. I'm just not letting a disorder ruin my life, everyday is a struggle but hey , who said life was supposed to be easy, so just hang on there do your best.

mostly my anxiety is at night , when its dark and im scared im going to die, i know its sounds wierd. it really does affect me alot, im always glad when i have good weeeks, one bought of my night anxiety will send me into a downward spiral, my mom is my inspiration, she is a survivor of severe social anxiety and agorophobia, she didnt work for years , but then something happened and she grew stronger and forced herself to do it, i guess it was quite literally sink or swim, so i follow my mom's footsteps

Im a very emotional person and i suffer from anxiety quite badly. i refuse to take meds therfore i rely on myself and the amazing feeling of fresh air. The most recent thing my anxiety had decided to throw at me is the fear of death. The fact i work in a nursing home with the elderly doesnt help as there is always the fear of seeing somethng i dont want to. why do i do it? because its a feeling of helping others. i just try my best to keep myself busy. how is anxiety gonna go away if we are constantly feeling anxious about getting anxiety?

Anyone feel free to mail me - i like giving advice where i can. xxx

i have worked in the same company and position for 12 years. that seems horribly long, but up until this year i was doing okay. my first PA was September, while i was working. i am re-assessing what i should be doing as a profession. most people in my position (i am a claims adjuster)last about 4 years or so and then burn out to do something different. i often wonder what about me lets me continue doing it. who knows, but it certainly tougher now than it used to be.

I pretty much told everyone at work what I was going through and there are a couple people who understand what is going on. So when I'm having a hard time I can go to them for support and I get through it. Plus I pretty much know when it's going to be a bad day or when it's going to be a good one and it doesn't matter if I'm at home or not so I might as well get paid while I'm freaking out.

I have physical disabilities as well as emotional, I haven't worked since 1993, have been on disability since '94. when my dad died. There are lots of people here on disabilility, maybe you just haven't come across them yet, I am usually in a diffferent community discussing my other issues.