I am 21, I live with my boyfriend, his mom, his two brothers and one of the brothers partner. I came from a very abusive home where I was in hell everyday and to the point of suicide. I was so thankful to be saved and brought here to live. But living here is not easy! My biological family are toxic so I know what it is like to be manipulated and almost to the point of being tortured. I have ptsd from all the trama I went through from being with my family. I am diagnosed with shizoaffective disorder, panic disorder, social anxiety, agoraphobia, ptsd, IBS, chronic migraine, and chronic fatigue.
So my problem is I am living in chaos. The leader of the house my boyfriends mother is not much of a leader. I love her and have grown so close to her but she has no backbone. No matter how much you try to make her improve or help her it always fails. It’s so much mental energy trying to help someone who wants help but wont take it. Maybe she doesn’t want help I don’t know?
The number one problem is brother number 1 and his fiancé. They are former heroin addicts, they are on suboxone. Brother 1 is not much of the problem it is his fiancé. She is terrible for everyone. She makes him feel small and is always yelling at him. She is a narcissist and definitely has a mental illness. She hides from everyone in the house (we will not see her for months). She steals prescription medication from everyone in the house. She stole 20 Xanax pills from me. I have to hide everything in crazy spots so she won’t get it. I had surgery resently and the doctors informed us that if anything was stolen we had to file police reports. She smokes in the house (we have a no smoking rule) and smokes pot constantly and if caught say “ hehe my bad”. Nothing is done about this.
I had drug addicts in my family and I have watched my family be destroyed by it. I have watched how toxic just one person can be on a whole family and it kills me. I can not let it happen to this one. I have a therapist I see regularly and my boyfriend is the best support. They tell me to stop wasting my energy on it but, I can’t let his mom lose everything because of this. She is so kind and has made the world a better place for me. I feel like my boyfriend and his mom saved me and I just can’t give up on them. I lost my biological family and had to find a new one. I don’t want them to be in so much pain over something that can easily be fixed. I have no control or say because it is not my house or my family.
I feel like I can’t handle anymore, it’s too much stress, pain, and energy to keep doing the same thing over and over. I’m breaking my body is physically getting bad. I’m getting sick easily and having stomach fits. I started having seizure like episodes a few months ago. I’m too young to be this ill. Sorry, for such a long one. I don’t know what to do anymore?
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