For 12 years I worked for the public in a government office while my anxiety increased over the years. I had reached a point to where I was having panic attacks and drawing a complete blank while I was trying to work. It was embarrassing and frustrating and every day I hated to go work because I was afraid of the attacks. I tried one medication after another but nothing made the anxiety stop to where I could actually perform my job without being so nervous and wanting to cry every day. Last year, I convinced my doctor to let me take a sick leave because of illness in our family and I felt SO much better after not being in the work environment that I convinced myself that I was better off to quit. I used my retirement to live and pay bills but now that is gone and I am completely terrified because I cannot find a job and even if I could I am afraid of dealing with what I did in my last position. I don't know what to do and staying at home relaxes me but I get very lonely at times when my family is at work. I take Lexapro and it helps with the anxiety, but I can't afford to pay for therapy and too embarrassed to go to state supported mental health. How can I overcome this until I find another job and what do I do if I have to face the public on my job again?
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