Fire her. She's judging. Not all of us have to lose everything. The book says, "we don't juge another's situation, our only desire is to be helpful." You're going to continue working with her? Doesn't sound like it's going too well or bearing much fruit. As a sponsor, I put in as much work as the other person. If someone's not serious, I find someone who is. In the readings it says, no matter how far down the scale we've gone....That alone tells me no 2 people's "bottom" is the same. Do you think celebrities lose everything and have train recks? No. They realize they've lost the power of choice, get into the book, and work the steps.

Seriously--what happened to "one day at a time?" "I will stay sober today."

BillW is right on the money.

I agree with BillW on this one, I managd to get of my train just before it crashed, suppouse your sponser is refering to yor rock bottom, we don't all have to go there, I think many of us get pretty close, some sadly stay on the train till the end, not very good advice if you ask me.

Hey I could afford to travel first class now if I wanted to, now thats better.

Getyour sponsor to explin and then challenge it if you don't agree

Trickey

I agree with Trickey, what she is talking about is hitting rock bottom, in some cases as mine I lost everything, but that doesn't happen to everyone.

I have also heard it said that "I was starting to lose who I was"

I can't judge and I won't judge anything or anybody ion this great program, however I get the feeling that she never had hit bottom, just stopped short of it.

The way my sponsor taught me, and his sponsor taught him and down the line, is don't come out harsh like that.

First you have to get a person to love themselves, after all most hate themselves for what they have done, work with them, teach them, there is no right or wrong way to work with a sponsee, but coming out like that after 12 days, usually puts a person in the place of 'well since I haven't hit I might as well go back out, and see what it's like.'

I would defintly get rid of her, and watch around the rooms until you find someone that you may feel comfortable with, hey I've been fired many times, but there is always somebody else. It doesn't hurt my feelings, I have too many now 9 is enough.

DougC

As far has hitting your 'rock bottom' or 'train wreck' I certainly hit mine!!Im still married and I still have my kids and family.It doesnt have to mean you lose everything before you stop drinking.YOU will be the only one to decide that.Good Luck xxx

sounds like the sponsor is being judged. ask your sponsor what she meant, exactly, and why she said it. Communicate but don't fire someone because they hurt your feelings, heck if that was true, i wouldnt be going back to meetings or visiting this site.
for me, statements like that only pushes me to think deeper and ask questions, as you have, but then i only have 60 days sobriety so what do i know

Thank You all for your responses. I just asked her to be my sponsor, she doesn't yet know what i have lost, or gone through or going through. I think maybe she just said it before knowing my past and present. I knew of her a year ago while attending meetings in the same place, she and her husband are very strong in the program. I will ask her to define it to me how she was saying it.
THANKS ALL>!!!

Satori77k

Congratulations to all of you,even if you're only one day sober!