well im not saying goodbye coz im going out there again im saying goodbye in a kinda good ending, havent drunk for 2days now, but there is sumting diffferent, rite now i have no desire to drink, actually i have no drink left in me no more, im done with it, it doesnt take away my problems it jus ads more n im done with being dishonest, theres always being that part of me that has being dying to get out there n treally work on myself but the drink drowne that part for a long time now, n its time i grew up n started taking responibltity for my actions im certainly not goniga get sober sitting in front of a computer.ive being accepted back on to this day programme,and im going to really try 1000% this time, im starting to accept that i am a alcoholic n i cant drin safely, going back on this day programme will b my second chance to really b vigoursloy honest, no more self pityin ,no more blamin every1 else, no more resentin coz it nearly destroyed me , iv being carrying resentments for a long time now, recetly iv had a reality check, i woke up this nmorning n thought, ,wat u goinga do mel , carry on drinking or start working, n ive decided to start working ,and i mean really trying my upmost, it will mean having no money for a while and living a honest life when my whole lifestyle was dishonest, having no money , is a gosend to me rite now coz i dont need it, nor do i want it, i used money as my god for a long time now, its timwe to start thinknig bout other ppl than myself, u guys also gave me a reality check wen i was thinknig i was on my own on this n im not mayb i wanted sympathy , but that wont get me better, coz it will b like im justifying myself to go out there n pick up that poison again. thankyou all for listening
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