I would like to ask if anyone on this list has been in a state-run rehab hospital. You could respond off list if you want to answer anonymously.

I'm at my wit's end. I don't know how to help my son anymore. He called me crying this morning and his girlfriend had thrown him out (again) and threatened to call the police if he didn't leave the premises. Apparently he slept in his car. I learned from one of his friends, who also lives near the girlfriend, that he had stolen her credit card the night before and bought beer and cigarettes. He had gotten a job driving a truck that started last week, worked two days, and then didn't wake up for the third day and they fired him (his drug test had come back diluted, but they gave him a chance anyway). I heard he begged for his job but his employer hung up on him. This is just typical stuff that's been going on for a long time, so nothing unusual.

He's lying to me when he even talks to me, other times he accuses me of causing his problems, even his breakup (whatever), and I think he has mental issues.

I don't know if I can even legally do anything, like committing him to a state hospital. He obviously needs help. I hate the thought of him going to jail - I know how detention cops will beat up a drunk just for something to do, but if he doesn't get away from his girlfriend's house, she will probably call the police. His friends are calling me as though I can do something, yet, I get flack for "enabling" him when I let him come to my house.

I invited him home this morning because he seemed to be resolved to the issue that his relationship with his girlfriend is over. I told him to come for Thanksgiving and I told my husband that I would listen to his crying for a day or two, but then I would tell him he can stay as long as he seeks professional help for his drinking.

It seems like he is hitting bottom, but one phone call from the girlfriend will send him to high hopes and he thinks he doesn't need help after that. She doesn't get that alcoholism is an illness and as much as I like her, I am aggravated that she puts him in situations where he is an idiot over her and he acts like a stalker. He can't see that he is not in a place for a healthy relationship.

He told another friend that he laid on the doorbell last night after being locked out. This is in the presence of a 5 year old boy, who he claims to love.

Its making my head spin and I was doing so good. And tomorrow is Thanksgiving, the day of eating crap, drinking and fighting, and suicides.

Is there a way to keep him from jail and put him in a hospital? He really needs help.

I'd appreciate any and all responses.