I've been attending AA meetings since Jan. but the longest I've been sober was only 17 days. Every time I relapsed, I climbed back on the wagon, went to meetings and tried again. This has gone on for 7 months. I'm so frustrated that I'm ready to quit trying. I have not been to a meeting nor talked to my sponsor in about 2 weeks. I have even used the weather as an excuse to drink (not joking)!?! My sponsor, an AA friend and my therapist all want me to go to treatment, but my husband doesn't. he did support (tolerate) me attending meetings, but he doesnt want me to be away as much as treatment would require nor does he want everyone to know that I have a drinking problem. of course, I suspect a lot of them already know. I know what I need to do, but I"m so tired of walking into a meeting with my tail between my legs confessing my sins. my husband is out of town and I've drank the past 2 nights from the time I got home until I went to bed. fortunately, there wasnt anything requiring me to drive my kids anywhere. I find myself avoiding phone calls and hoping no one stops by because I dont want them to see me drunk. why I'm more worried about what an acquaintance would see vs. what my kids are seeing, I have no idea. I guess that just shows how truly sick my thinking has become. I feel hopeless. anyway, thanks for listening.
Posts You May Be Interested In
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...