Forever it seems as though I have wanted to stop but my lifestyle and work enabled it. (I promoted smokes at bars). Havn't been sober too long and my anxiety and fears are so overwhelming. Spent six days last week sober and relapsed. Now it has been since Sun. and I am reaching out to others for your support. I wish I could be a social drinker but I know it will never happen. I have always had an hardcore attitude but not in a positive way and I feel as I am pissing my life away due to the fact It is hard for me to go to work and school and I might be dropped from the profession I want, due to lack of attendence. I only have 5 mos left and screwing it up even not drinking. I don't know how to let the others in my life to understand my pain and strife and I feel absolutely alone.
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